Is this outcome what I really want?

2011-04-05T08:18:00.001+08:00

真的很不可思议，前几天竟然收到你的简讯，你的问候。两年了，为什么现在呢？是因为你无意中看到我的部落格还是因为女友跟你分手了？我是不会相信你良心发现或什么别的理由，因为我太了解你了。

你知道吗，我听到手机响，看到你的号码，我不敢相信，也不知到该不该回复。到最后，只想告诉你，我和女儿过的很好。很开心你决定专心在事业上。

。。。

Sent from my iPhone

2011-03-27T02:15:00.000+08:00

世界上真的有人可以彻底的忘记一个人吗？一个你曾经说过爱她，说过要照顾她一辈子，说过会让她幸福。这都是谎言和废话，不是吗？我不是要求什么因为毕竟是我选择放弃，但是，怎么样，她是你的女儿，一年多了，问候她的话都没有。连她的生日，一个简讯也没收到。以前，很懒散，找一份工就像要你的命，现在应该会想了，会疼现任的女友，但你忘了在这个世界上你还有一个女儿，等你疼爱她，等着你告诉她，你就是她的爸爸。两年了，一直都没在联络，没看她，我真的不知道以后要不要让她知道她有你这样的父亲。我真的不知道。

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2011-03-23T20:47:00.000+08:00

Cheeky Lovelle :)

2011-03-23T20:43:00.001+08:00

Do I regret not taking the chance to study hard in the past? Maybe.. But I can't take it lying down that even though I know how to do what the other person is doing now, I did it before, I sometimes even answered her questions regarding it, but she's drawing a higher salary than me.
Just because of? She has a Diploma certificate and I only have failed O levels? Hahah.. Reality that is.

If ever the person I'm mentioning about reads this, don't take it to heart. No hard feelings towards you. :)

It seems like I don't have enough time for the work I'm given. I swear I was not slacking. I was typing the whole day long but it can't seem to end. :(

Sigh hai hai.

Sent from my iPhone

Fwd:

2011-01-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

> Took half day leave today for Lovelle's first day of school! Lucky that I didn't miss it. :) we were afraid that we'll be late, thus a cab. Nothing much today for it's just orientation, letting us parents know their core values, blah blah and some rules and regulations, of course what they will be doing as well. Behaved quite well today, probably because we are there. Separation anxiety will set in tomorrow, and I won't be around. :( after everything ended, we were allowed to look around and she got stuck at the gym corner, even when she is the last student around. She did not want to leave at all! Hahah! Prays hard for tomorrow, just gotta wait for my mom to update me.
>
> Lovelle's school fees have been disturbing me quite alot. Afraid that I could not cope financially alone at all, even with the financial subsidy. But after today, seeing how much she enjoyed herself in the new environment and keeps telling me that she wants to go school and play, and make friends, it's enough, for me to persevere on. No matter what. :)
>
> Lovelle, Mommy loves you!

2011-01-04T23:28:00.000+08:00

Test

Sent from my iPhone

2010-12-27T19:45:00.000+08:00

Christmas present for Lovelle which Mommy kept complaining cos she feels that it's not worth the price and that Lovelle keeps messing the whole house with all the small little magnet pieces. Lol.. But what's most important is that she likes it, the priceless expression when she opened up the present. :)

2010-12-16T08:17:00.000+08:00

Cheeky lovelle. :)

Okay.. I stared at my phone for a whole five minutes on the bus, not knowing what to blog. Hmm...!

Needed to get something of my chest, guess my blog is the only place, though I've talked to Baby about it but it's still bothering me.

I've came to realize that I have people disliking me, or probably even hate me, up till now though I can't remember when on earth did I step on her tail, our paths did not cross at all before. & I wonder, why is it so senseless. If it's because of who I was in the past, it's already in the past. If it's because of what I am now after being a mom, I do believe that I'm much better than some others. Although the feeling suck upon knowing that you are being disliked, but there's probably nothing you can do.

But as I kept thinking about why do they have to dislike me till that extent and that they are such asses, it felt like a slap across my own face. There is someone I dislike now, in fact I probably hate her. Although she did things that gave me all the reasons to not even talk to her, but I'm making my own life tiring, isn't it? So.. I should just get her out of my life and stop bitching about her. :)

Ciao.

2010-12-15T08:06:00.000+08:00

You, you and you. People who added colors to my life. :)

Limited photos taken using my phone with different people. To the others, it's not that you did not make any difference in my life k. :)

2010-12-14T08:12:00.000+08:00

How awesome now that I have an iPhone, I can blog on the travel! Although I could spend some of these times in the morning on the way to work sleeping, but ohwell! ^^

Errh.. Christmas is coming, present for lovelle? I don't know.. Probably gotta shop real soon. Christmas parties, drinking sessions, I don't know to go which. I wonder sometimes how would he feel if there's a celebration and I say I'm not intending to ask him along because it's a tradition, without boyfriends around or something. Cos thats what happened to me. Hahah. Nevermind! Anyways..

Had BBQ steamboat with weizhong yesterday at bugis. Supposedly seoul gardens but colleague recommended another restaurant yet their service sucks to the max by just saying, oh table for two, wait till 830, and shut the door without further explaining. Dumb. We just decided on some place nearby and the guy who was in charge of cutting the beef gave us this much. Crazy max. -.-

2010-12-14T01:05:00.000+08:00

Swimming with Lovelle! Loves this pic to the max! Heheh.

2010-12-14T01:02:00.000+08:00

Test

Sent from my iPhone

2010-10-08T11:13:00.002+08:00

Been long. Been really long.
Days are packed. Time left for me is sleep! Need that reallyy badly. :(

Stumbled onto Love's biological father's facebook profile recently. Didn't even know he has one. Not like it affected me that much. But it feels really odd. Haven't hear from him, read/seen about him for almost a year, or even more. Suddenly, it feels familiar, yet strange. Hahah. Unsure how he's living right now, but shouldn't care much either, cos my daughter's nothing to him, so what is he to me?

Hmm.. Put that aside.
Been meeting up with Wenbin recently. Not frequent, but at least a few times. :) Thinking back, knew him through WLNY, and why I took notice of him among the rest of the guys in that website is .. He has the same birthday as me! That is why I'm more interested in being friends with him. Though because of previous bf, kind of strained the friendship between us. But I'm glad that Ryan doesn't control me, he's fine with me out with friends. ^^
Was really surprised when Wenbin passed me a long sleeve top and a jacket the other night. I didn't expect any of these, from friends, much less a male friend. Heheh. & his reason was: I remembered you said before that you haven' t been shopping, buying clothes for a long time so bought these for you.
How sweet right? Who says that platonic friendship doesn't exist? I have one, and just him. ^^

Gonna meet .. Tingxun and Jason later after work at Dover. Then .. If possible, dessert in the late night with Wenbin after I put Lovelle to bed. Teehee.

R/S wise .. We don't have much time to meet anymore cos he's studying now. Revision and all at night. Whether or not this last, I don't know. But I know that I've been trying to liven things up in our r/s. Nothing much basically, but just sending sweet messages occasionally, asking him how's school. A surprise kiss or a hug. There are some changes from him, which is not a good thing. Talked to him about it yesterday, he understood, he realised it as well. Hmm.. Its either, I accept the changes, or he revert the changes.

Work wise .. Terrible. Mentor left the company. Everything is in a mess. More things are thrown to me. HELP! :(

Lovelle wise .. Realised that she and I are really similiar. When we can't get things right, tantrums will be thrown. As for her, just like she couldn't fit the alphabets in the right position, she will be very frustrated. Which is not a good thing! Zzz. Now .. She keeps saying, I don't know. I don't want. In a really cute accent. Hahah! Hugs from her is realllyy a remedy to everything. :)

Okay, nothing much now..

Cya ladies tomorrow! :)

2010-08-14T09:59:00.002+08:00

Better post about my birthday before I forget about it.

Thursday ..
Went to class with him, wasn't expecting anything, because its in his class. But actually had a surprise mini celebration with a cake, with the help of a few of his friends. Appreciated. :)

Friday ..
Slept at home till quite late. Went to Yishun, met up with my ladies for ramen. As usual, took alot of photos, & thanks to him for helping me out with Love. :) Didn't go anywhere else after that.

Saturday ..
Slept at home till quite late AGAIN. Went Pasir Ris chalet with him and Love, for Wen Bin's birthday celebration. Love kept wanting the balloons, didn't really eat much and had to leave during the photo taking with cake, before cake cutting. :( but still .. hope he appreciated our presence.
Supper with him at Thomson after that. <3

Sunday ..
Sentosa with him, Love and my family. Love was so facinated with the beach. Lol! Enjoyed the sand and all. Dumb me stood up without watching it and hit the tree branch on top of me which is as thick as a tree trunk kind. -.- Baby had to leave early cos of his dinner. :( walked around with family in Sentosa, wished he was there with me.

Monday ..
National Day .. I guess I slacked at home, that's all. I think.

I'd like to thank the people who gave me presents.
Him - Perfume / Parfum , whatever lol!
Chubbs - Handmade bracelet, awesome!
Weizhong - Box with our photos at each side, cool!
Yuki - Mickey top. ^^
Idk who for the cake and Idk who for the cash vouchers. But love ya all!

2010-08-01T10:39:00.002+08:00

Maybe I should make it a point to wake up early on weekends before Lovelle does so that I can blog. :)
Its Sunday.. Pretty nervous about the event later although it has nothing got to do with me. I'm just afraid that what I wear will be unsuitable for it. :( Oh well! We'll just see how later.

Last night was funnnn. Just chilling at Chubbs' place. It beats any other thing like chilling at Starbucks/Town/anywhere! We could be comfortable on our own. Borrowed a shawl and belt/necklace(accessories) from her and she gave me a bag and top. That's realllyyy nice of her. & now I understand why she says that she can't find the present that she got for Love from her Thailand trip, from the way her room looks. :x Had dinner at her place.. Cabbed home after that.

Tomorrow's Monday. I always worry about work on Sunday. Like if there's anything that I've left out, I forgot to do or whatsover. :( I've really got to kick off this bad habit isn't it? Why worry so much when you're not even paid to on Sundays. HAHAHA.

Birthday's approaching yet I don't really feel like celebrating. Its just of like a chance for all of us ladies to really get together, and it better be all! :P & as with Baby, another treasured day for us to spend time alone together.

Gotta go get stuff done before Love wakes up!
Till then.

2010-07-31T09:30:00.002+08:00

Everytime when I have so many thoughts to blog about, I don't have the time. Now on a Saturday morning, I have the time, I can't remember what I wanna blog about for the past week. Ohwells.. Just have to forgo all those thoughts and blog about something fresh in my mind. :)

This weekend and the next is gonna be fun-filled.
31July - Pearl Chubbs's place. Yay!
1August - Baby's idk what event, which is considered fun as well I suppose cos its his event. ^^

Dreaded weekdays ...
Then here comes 5 August!
After work I'll be heading out to idk where yet with Baby, to celebrate my birthday...
Took annual leave on my birthday..
6August - Bringing Love out in the day (idk where yet x.x) and meeting my precious ladies in the evening, (also dk where -.-)
7August - Should be going Wenbin's birthday chalet. A friend who has the same birthday as me, that was also why we became friends in the first place. :D
8August - Somewhere with Baby since Mommy's bringing Love up to granny's place..
9August - I SERIOUSLY DON'T KNOW.
So many days of not needing to go to work, probably just stay at home on National Day..

Its going to be my birthday again. Which means.. Its close to one year that I've last seen Love's biological father, the same goes for Love. Talking about birthdays! I just wanna thank Pearl Chubbs. :) :) :) Thought back of my oh so miserable 18th birthday spent at home with just KFC delivery, and when I was about to cry that no one actually wanted to celebrate my birthday for me, she popped by my place, with BS, with slices of cakes (I think), two necklaces and 1 bracelet, with a happy birthday card as well.
Though 19th was a big one, but as I've said before.. If I didn't leave him, my 19th will probably be just Mc Delivery or something. He just wanted to make it up.. But nevertheless, I'm still grateful.

Now that all the hoo-haa has gone down, I start to look at you and think back, about how well I actually know you, and what kind of person you tried to protray, but as the months go by, lies exposed, true colors show. When we were together, the people you badmouthed, the people you said that they aren't good friends and never ever wanna waste time on them anymore. But now, it continues as a cycle, I realised. I don't know which is you anymore.

Shall video Love someday when she does the happy-sad-angry expressions.

PS. My boyfriend is reallllyyyyy nice to me. :D :D Loves ya!

2010-07-18T14:36:00.007+08:00

Exciting end of week I had. :)

Went to watch MMA at Sentosa Resort World with Baby, and his relatives cos they had extra tickets. Was really nervous to meet his relatives, but glad to say, they aren't that scary. Made fun of me and him that's all. :) First time going there and we've got the VIP seats, drinks and food are all free. Coolzxzx. Had a cup of Vodka + Red Bull. Spent about 3 hours there, watching the matches. Didn't like to watch fighting at all cos you see bruises and blood everywhere, but the female match was so intense. Happy that I went. :)

Is this one of the differences between him and the previous? No matter what, he would assure me that everything's going to be fine, he brought me to meet his relatives, whereas the previous just avoided anything and everything. & I'm actually quite surprised that his aunt and uncle didn't give me any weird expressions. Probably cos they don't judge? It kinda made me feel at ease, at least not everyone in his family detest me. His cousins are great. We could have conversations. One even said that his impression of me gets better each time. That was really shocking as no one has ever told me that before, they usually say that it gets worse each time or something. Haha! Thanks ya. Doubt you'll see this anyway. :D

Brought Love for a movie on Saturday at Balestier. :) Her first movie in her life and she was quite attentive during the first half. After leaving, she kept pointing up in the sky, to the moon and says 'catch the moon!'. Lol! Was hilarious.

Love him and her.

2010-07-11T13:13:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was the first time Love saw fireworks. But because she's afraid of thunder, she's afraid of the sound as well. Hahaha.

TCC as usual on Saturdays.
She was too engrossed in the Ipod Touch that she didn't even wanna take photos with me. :(

First time I felt like leaving there and then. Wasn't informed and left alone at the table with Love for more than 2 hours. Niceeeee. Ordered a slice of cake since Love was insisting on having one. Was really bored and brought Love down to Mcdonald's for ice cream. Sat on the steps, facing the boats and lights. Love kept saying water, swimming. -.- Then when the boats came by, she will shout and wave, Hi Boat!! Then when it got further, she will say Uh-oh! No more! Bye Boat! Lol..

Went back to TCC. Just when I thought that everything's over, I was left alone again. All the while through, Love always wanted to go over and look for him, she kept calling out to him. I had to tell her that he's busy, and distract her with other stuff. Its really really heart warming when she tells me and points him to me. But.. Sigh. Second round started, brought Love down again, to Mcdonald's again, for fries this time round. Finished the fries and walked around with her. Saw this angmoh taking photos of the scenery, she took my phone and took photos of them. & they were so surprised. Hahaha.

The joke of the day - Faster! Go away! = Go away fcuker!
LOL.

2010-07-05T23:57:00.013+08:00

Photos of Lovelle!
The recent ones are at the top of the post and the bottom are the back dated ones. Sundays are when she goes out with Mommy. Those photos with her taken near the door, against the wall are when she was about to go out. I have no idea why she has to bring out a different soft toy every weekend. Lol..

Taken at TCC. She loves the bean bags. Literally lies on them. Hahaha.

Hip hop eh? Lol.. She put the cap on herself, this position.

One of the Saturdays we went to West Coast Park. Look at her expressions while looking at fries and ice cream. -.-

Loves playing with shades. Act cool eh? Hahaha!

Forever wanting to sit on this machine whenever I walk past it with her.

Brother's girlfriend had her hair tied up. She only wants her hair to be tied by her.

The day we went swimming. Phone went out of batt even before we reached the swimming complex. Zzzz.

I love those few photos below of her with the bag! So adorable! :D

Crazy times at home.

That's not quite alot of photos. But still, took me 1 hour to post this.

**Getting her to sleep is quite easy now. I just have to use the cane and gently tap on the floor/table, making the knocking sound and she will just be quiet, tossing and turning around on the bed until she falls asleep. Yes, she's afraid of the cane. Haha.

2010-06-27T19:55:00.002+08:00

We have to hide. From her who least expected that he would lie. To cover up, so that we could be together. But if she were to find out, she is going to be heartbroken, something me and him wouldn't want to cause.

Sometimes I wonder, its not as if we don't love each other, we could never get sick of seeing each other, maybe because its just the start of the relationship, Maybe. But its so tough to go through. I've never felt like this before, never ever had the thought if leaving someone when I love him so much, until now.

I don't wanna hurt someone whom he loves so much as she does as well. I feel terrible when I have to be left out when he needs to go for his stuff with family. I feel unreal, when I'm currently known to her as another person. I feel insecure, knowing the fact that everything will end if she were to know, which probably would happen sooner or later.

After the one week that he has left my side, the first few days, I wouldn't wanna think about it. But as the time goes by, I still miss him, I really do. But the feeling changes. I start to think, was it because, he just gave me the attention at the right time when I needed someone or is he just the right person? Then I started rewinding, thinking of how he treated me. He was fabulous, we hadn't quarrelled. When both of us felt that there might be sparks to quarrel, we would give in, together. Any of my past relationships weren't like that. I just feel different now that I'm together with him. It seems like, he has moulded me to someone who is giving in more than all to make this perfect, okay, close to perfect.

Tears form whenever I think about it. :( Adding on to that, financial problems is also another issue. $ seems to be runnning out fast. I tried to save, but at the end of the month, it was hard to even make ends meet. I hadn't spent on myself. But .. Sigh. Whenever I think that I need a little help, I stopped and convinced myself that I can do it, she's my daugther. My responsiblity. But until when? I don't know.

I'm glad I have him. I'm fortunate to. But..
Could it be that, if we were to go our own ways, our lives would be better?

2010-06-19T00:28:00.002+08:00

Gonna post almost the entire of yesterday now. Pleasant memories. (: Bascially just the surprises I received.

17 June 2010
Dear was leaving Singapore for Bali, thus he need not go to work. Btw, his workplace is just 15 minutes walk away from mine. He finished packing his stuff for the trip at about 3am. Yet, he decided to give me a surprise by coming to my place early in the morning. (Probably cos I did so for him few days back. =x) He took mms of him outside my place, but I was too rushed to check my phone. When I opened my door, and caught a glimspe of him standing behind the wall. I was touched, like really touched. He could have gotten his beauty sleep, after lack of rest for the past few days due to work and all. So! We train-ed down to Macpherson. He walked me to my office. Then he went off. *Which I thought he went home, but no! -.-*

Took half day leave. He came to surprise me once again by coming to my office when I could leave, with a stalk of sunflower. Like as I said in FB, I prefer sunflowers than roses. I'd rather have a stalk of sunflower, than a bouquet of roses, like how I want him and not anyone else. (: Had a great time spent together. Then there comes the third surprise. He bought a necklace for me. Trying to get me to sit down somewhere so he could show it to me but as he want to keep it in suspense, and I didn't know what was going on, didn't felt like sitting down as well, so he used a few hours to convince me, to find somewhere to chill. =x

Few days back, I was saying randomly that I like his cologne smell. & that I'm gonna miss him so much after he leaves for Bali. So! We decided on getting a soft toy and his cologne on it. Which is a monkey! Cheek monk & Cheeky monkey. ^^

Cried when I was on the train towards Town. :( I'm just.. Too emotional.

The first day to work without certainly feels awkward. Something's missing, someone. There isn't his presence. But he came online for a while when I was working. Chatted a little while.. That's it.

Its just a week. & I'm feeling like this. How am I suppose to manage if he goes for studies overseas? Hmm! But but. One day has passed. 6 more days to go before he comes back!

Dear, I don't know if you will read my blog, but if you do, I MISS YOU! <3>

2010-05-28T16:19:00.003+08:00

Love took Bro's sunglasses and came running to me. Asking me to put it on for her. Then she reached out for my phone and said, 'photos'. Haha!
But of course, I asked her to pose like that.

The first two photos, saying bye to me before leaving for my Grandmother's place with my Mom. (:

She's sick now. Mom's sick as well. I'm sick. He's sick. EVERYONE'S SICK!

A long weekend. Which I'd rather not have cos he's at Batam. Hahah.
Can't plan anything either for myself. Home it shall be! ^^

2010-05-20T00:08:00.002+08:00

Trying to look demure when taking photos, crossing her legs, putting her hands on it.

Cos the night before, she saw a 5-6 year old girl being taught that. Lol.

2010-05-17T23:00:00.002+08:00

Thanks to those who spoke up for me.
Thanks to those who really knew me.

&..
To those who are criticising me. We probably knew each other? If you hate me till that extent, there's nothing else I can say. There's nothing else I wanna say as well. Go on. Continue, if it extends your life span or something.

Tired for the past week. Didn't have enough sleep, too much drama.
As stated in my facebook, we got into a 'fight'. :/
But not exactly fight, though I felt that he almost wanted to.
We pushed each other, I tried to kick him away. Accidents happen.
Fell. Injured. Bruises. Blueblacks. & he's fine.

Love's getting crazier by the day. I'm having more stress at work as well.
But there's one motivation that keeps me going on. (:
Even if it means the mere 5 minutes, it would bring me through my day with a smile.

Oh. Talking about work. Probation period is ending.. Confirmation date is coming.. Hope there will be a increase in salary. Haa.

**I wanna go Taiwan and take couple photos~ :D

2010-05-11T00:09:00.000+08:00

Been really active on Facebook.
Lots of things happened.

We've broken up.
I've broken up with him.
Not mainly because of the other him.
If everything has gone well for us, nothing of these sorts would have happened.
I'm not blaming you, its my fault, I shouldn't have had feelings for the other and made the 10 year brothership soured.
I don't mean to hurt you.
I didn't want to say those words to break your heart.
But you're seriously pissing me off, with everything you've done.
Behind my back.
I didn't wanna hate you, but you're forcing me to.

As for me and the other.
I do admit I have feelings for him now.
But many thoughts running through my mind.
What is going on? Is this the right thing to do?
Why do I want to shut myself out from everyone who's telling me things I chose not to hear?
Sigh. I just hope that this is the right thing to do.

Even if its not, I wouldn't regret breaking up with him now.
Cos our relationship wasn't even whole to start with.
It was broken just 3 months after being together.

2010-04-28T23:04:00.003+08:00

I always told myself that I should update my blog everyday. But time doesn't allow me to. ): that mere 5 hours after work which include my transport back home, dinner and bath is so not enough.

Hmm.. Been to Formula Drift 2010 with him last weekend. First day wasn't nothing much cos we went there really late. Then left to Pasir Ris to join Cheewei and group for BBQ and roller-blading. Did enjoyed myself, alot. Been long since I've last worked out. Hahaha. Second day's weather literally wanted my life. Although we were at the grand stand that has shelter, I was near to melting. After spending almost the whole afternoon there, Singapore Flyer's toilet is Heaven. Especially by standing right below the aircon. Lol.

Took quite alot of photos but as my facebook status stated, something's wrong with the memory card, or was it the card reader. I can't upload photos. ):

Work, work and work.
I get to communicate better with my 'mentor', though get abit of naggings when I did something wrong. Had pizza 2 days back cos was raining heavily. Wanted to get Mcdonalds but the operator said that for the safety of the riders, they can't take our orders right now and all of us were surprised. Switched to Canadian Pizza.. Then 'mentor' decided that I should finish it up since I'm a really big eater. Then I became the topic for the next few days during lunch. He was saying that I always eat alot. During lunch, he has never seen me eat the small portion of noodles but always ordered the big one. =x
The next day.. Proved him right again by buying two chicken wings after finishing a bowl of noodles, but I was really hungryyyy.
As for today, two bowls of kuay for my kuay chap. Wahahah.

I'm feeling more independent at work now. I hope to be totally independent so I wouldn't have to bother the rest by bombing them with questions. Gotta work hard!

Michelle, JY JY! (:

2010-04-17T17:25:00.002+08:00

Some pics taken in the car on some day which I can't really remmeber when.

Up till date.. Lovelle's already 26months old. Wow. Time really flies.
Sigh.

Ain't really in a good mood recently. It just goes up and down. Mixed up thoughts in mind, till I can't figure what is it about.

Probably heading up to Yishun, grandma's place tomorrow with Love and Mommy. I wanna meet Jehm and Renata! & of course her princess.

Work has been tedious, for my brain. Got to figure out how to do and all, even my colleague asked why do I look so stressed up. Reason: How to issue renovation invoice. Totally squeezed my brain juice dry. Managed to complete it yesterday, after two-three days, felt weight off my shoulders, literally. This is work, I guess. Got to learn how to cope with it.

2010-04-13T22:21:00.002+08:00

Lovelle just said Bless you after she sneezed. Hahaha.

Its been really long since I've last blogged. Thought I could do so in office, but no. I have so many things to do. & after I got home, hardly have the time to use the computer. On weekends as well cos I'll probably be out with Love.

Nothing much recently, work, work and work.
Hmm.. Love has learnt how to sing alot of songs.
ABC, Rain rain go away, Incy wincy spider, Baa baa black sheep, Humpty dumpty, London bridge is falling down and of course, Counting from 1 to 20. Also, she learnt how to recognise numbers. (: OHYA. Barney's I love you, you love me as well. ^^

Quarrelled on the way back from work.
Tears fell down, I looked like a fool on the train pressing the buttons on my phone.
Tried to control, until I saw this lady who sat beside me.
Something caught my eye.
The plain gold wedding band on the fourth finger of a pregnant lady.
That's probably the most blissful thing I've ever thought of having.
Ya. Then I stopped crying, just like that.

Right now, Love's being crazy with the blanket. Walking around the house with it covering herself. Lol.

This post is kinda messed up, I know.

Chubbs! I'm here for you! Girlfriend, for you as well, though I don't think you read my blog.

2010-03-29T17:08:00.002+08:00

Love had fever on Saturday..
Then it worsened the next day with cough + phlegm.
After what has happened last night => private post below,
I took care of her myself throughout the night.
Woke up about 5 times, cos she coughed and cried.
I myself had less than 3 hours of sleep.
Dragged myself out of bed..
On the way to work, got honked by car at the carpark cos I didn't watch where I was walking.
Just had alot of things going through my mind. + Love.
Sigh.

Called Mommy during lunch and she said she had brought her to the doctor again.
Love has throat infection, and if within two days, its still that serious, then she might have to be admitted into hospital. ):

Talked to my colleague about it. & what I can do is take urgent leave = unpaid leave if there's really a need to.

So many things came crashing down when I just thought that things were looking up.
But nevertheless, whatever that has happened made it clearer to me that Baby is always here with me.

2010-03-29T17:06:00.001+08:00

When things get ugly in the family, and you felt so much like blogging, you could only do so in private.

2010-03-26T11:32:00.004+08:00

Now that my life is like a routine, just don't like it when things cropped up, then everything got delayed. I'm probably just someone who likes things that are planned and it has to go according to the plan. Otherwise I would get really agitated.

My relationship with him now is somewhat stable.
But I miss the roundings with him, the late nights out and times when we slept in the car. (:

I'm going to Malaysia with him later after work.

Then on Saturday, I'll be bringing Love to Tampines while Baby goes to the workshop for his car.

On Sunday.. No plans yet.
Yet.

2010-03-23T15:44:00.002+08:00

Met up with my ladies at ShawHouse last Saturday, yes, with Love.
She was really quiet and well-behaved at the beginning when we reached. But after she got all so familiar with them and the surroundings, she started to create havoc. Chased after her a couple of times, and she was laughing all the way, thought I was playing with her. -.-

On that day, I spent $20. On food. >< Its over my budget! But nevermind.. Its just once in a while that I bring Love out. (:

Anyway..
I had a really great time with my ladies. The catching up about our own lives, the bitching about others session with Chubbs, =x. The laughing at Boyfriend times. BOYFRIEND! COMPLIMENT! 2 DOOR, 2 SEAT! =p
A pity that Girlfriend didn't make it. ):
People were looking at us, not sure if its because we made too much noise, or is it Love's existance. Whyyyyyy. Just because I've a kid, then I cannot catch up with my beloved girls? *Rolls eyes.
Baby then came over to fetch us after he reached Singapore from Malaysia. Had some little chat with him about his drift session. Proud of him that he really surprised others with his drifting skills. Way to go Baby! (:
Got Love home & I changed my leggings out into shorts and headed to ECP for Qianhui & Junming's birthday celebration~. Then we quarrelled. Quite a fierce one. I don't know why we always do that when we are at friends' birthday parties. >< I'm sorry to the two birthday people! For spoiling the mood, if we did. Headed home at 6am?
Things are fine between us now. Just hope that things wouldn't worsen.

Btwwwww. Thanks Baby for initiating to fetch me to work this morning, upon seeing how tired and sick I am. (: (: (: & Thank God you did, otherwise I would be drenched in the rain without my umbrella which you spoilt the day before with that strong wind and rain. =D

2010-03-20T13:39:00.004+08:00

I have alot of things to blog about. I have alot of thoughts. I don't know where to start from.

2 photos of Love. One of her covering her face with both hands for I don't know what reason, I think its because she doesn't wanna take photos. The other of us kissing. I tell you! Now when I wanna take photos with her, she would say kiss kiss which means she wants to take kissing photos. -.- After that she sees the photos, and would comment whether its nice or not nice. Its so adult laaaaa. Lol..

Love.
Baby went to Malaysia today. Its just Love and me since Mommy had stuff to do.
Mini bonding with her in the morning. B
rought her downstairs to get some food and stuff that she likes from a teeny weeny pasar malam beside the coffeeshop.
(Mommies must be thinking, 'Wtf? What kind of bonding is that?' As I'm working now, nights on weekdays are really just for eating, bathing, then sleep kind. Weekends are the only days for me and Love.)
Then we shared a bowl of fish porridge, scooped some out on her bowl and she ate it herself, without making much of a mess. So proud of her. (:
1 thing that I have to blog about today.
She urinated in the potty for the first time today!!(: (: (: (: (:
With my help! Not Mommy's, not Baby's, but me!
So what if I'm working, I still get to experience her first times. ^^

Friends.
Browsing through blogs, and in Facebook. I've realised that Primary classmates are still in a clique. Secondary classmates too. Then, where's mine? I've practically lost contact with most of them. Or rather, we don't even contact at all.
Xueting! Michelle! Where are youuuuu. xD

Baby.
Left this for the last part because I know I have tons to say.
You say you can't feel the love from me. But I seriously have no idea what else could I do.

After coming back from work, there are some times when I really felt like flaring up at you. But I controlled myself. I don't want us to quarrel again.

Its a every weekday thing, at night, we would be pissed with each other before sleeping. In the morning, it seems like nothing has happened the day before. Have you realised that? Why is this so?

Do you know, that everytime when you told me that there's a meetup? You're telling me, yes, we are going tonight. Its not, do you want to go? Are you feeling tired? Its not. I tagged along. Okay, a part of it is because I genuinely want to accompany you, although I can't be involved in the conversations cos I know nuts about cars. I could only laugh along with there are jokes cracked.

But the other reason of why I still go with you although I'm very tired, tired to the extent that if you give me a minute, or even seconds, I can fall asleep straight, is, I'm afraid. I don't want you to go anywhere without me. Anywhere means a possibility that you would get to know someone new. Someone you might develop feelings for. Someone that you might be interested in.

But sometimes I've been thinking to myself. How much can I control. You could even leave your work and run your own errands outside. What makes it impossible that you will meet whoever you want and not let me know about it?

Do you know that I really felt like just letting it go. Just give you the freedom that you ought to have. Meet up with your guy friends without me if there's a need to cos its men talk. But something is pulling me back. So strong that I held back, and just let things be as it is now.

I've been reading this romance novel when I'm on the way to work on public transport. Its between a couple. Every chapter, its alternate between the male and female. About their thoughts and all. This is what you see only in books, in scripts, in movies, in dramas. In real, in our lives, our thoughts can never be as clear to each other.

Sometimes, I would just think of you. Like just now, I saw Ramly Burger at the pasar malam. I thought of you immediately. I thought of buying for you, then I remembered that you had already left for Malaysia. Then you called me, I was surprised. I thought it would be a reminder of, .. maybe bring umbrella when you're out with the girls if its raining? But no. Its shouting. Its demanding, asking me where did I put the white cards. Heart sank.

Like how I thought of you suddenly at times, would you too? Would you be thinking of me when you're at Malaysia, while watching your hobby, your interest of drifting? Or no? I've no idea.

Honestly, I don't want to hide from you, you gave me the feeling that you are sick of me, sick of this relationship. The words you said to me last night has proven it. Its not that you want to be with me. Its just that you don't know how to break up with me.

What can I say?

2010-03-19T09:54:00.002+08:00

Haven't been blogging.
Had alot of things to do at work which I'm glad cos it keeps the time running and not crawling.
By the time I reach home, I'm dead beat. Time is spent on dinner, Love and bath. & approx about 5 minutes of net surfing.

Going to Qianhui & Junming's birthday celebration tomorrow night at ECP.
Sweet, isn't it? A couple for 3 years(?), birthdays are near, so they celebrate together. (:
As for the afternoon.. Supposedly promised Baby to go Malaysia with him.
But my ladies are meeting.
><
Shall see how it goes. Sigh sigh.

A little bit of update about Love.
I was drinking cold water last night after dinner.
She spotted me, gave me a cheeky look and came forward to me.
I had a mouthful of water.
Then she stood right in front of me.
Telling me, mouth mouth. Mommy Pleaseeeee. With her eyes trying to open wide, giving the innocent look. She knows that we've been trying to teach her to say two words at one time. So she did it yesterday without us telling her to do so! Then ya. She goes, Pleaseee Mommy, Mommy Please, like a few times.
Darn adorable.

Alright, back to work. ^^

2010-03-11T14:54:00.002+08:00

Baby called me in the afternoon yesterday, telling me that he wanted to go in Malaysia with his friend and asked me if I could come along..
Called Mommy to inform that we were not going back for dinner, then Baby went back to my place to get my passport for me, then to Paya Lebar to fetch me from work. :))))
A very pleasant surprise when I first saw him, cos he's in his new ride! Something that he has been longing for since months. But he kept it from me since the night before cos he has already gotten the car. Mommy played along and hid it from me too. Lol..

As I was saying in my facebook status, was really pissed when I found out that I'm not the first female to sit in his car, but laughed out loud when I knew that its Love. Mommy brought Love down to the carpark when Baby went back to get my passport. From what I heard from Baby, Love roamed around the back leather seats and Mommy was telling her to put her legs down cos her shoes are dirty.

Okay, back to Malaysia. Took about 1hour+ to get in cos there was quite a jam. Then we had our late dinner of abalone noodles. Then ... Pumped petrol, but there's a limit of 20 litres, so we went to 3 petrol stations. -.- Headed back to Singapore, to Jalan Kayu/Yishun Dam to meet his friends who wanted to see his car. I fell asleep on the way there. I was still sleeping when we reached. Woke up a few times but lazy to get out of the car and socialise. Then I slept all the way, until we reached home. I don't even know that Baby drove and left first.
Is it that his new ride is more comfortable than the previous, or I'm just too tired? Haha.

Thanks Baby for understanding and not be pissed at me that I slept all the way while you were driving, that kind of made you look like a chauffeur, but you are not okay! You are my Baby.

As for this morning, Baby drove me to workkkkkkk! For the first time! ^^ We took lesser time than we expected we would. Thought there would be a massive jam, but we only took about 20 minutes. Half boiled eggs for breakfast then off to work.

Had a dreaded conversation with Baby at noon. Cos he was feeling negative about our relationship all over again. For a moment I thought he was going to leave me, by the words he uses and all, I broke down. Yes, in office!! But luckily there are no calls coming in, no one standing near me. ><

Baby! Please ah! Stop all these. Don't ever repeat this okay. I've never regretted being together with you. You did not break my family up. It was already broken to start off with.

I miss Love! It seems like I hadn't seen her for 2 days. Cos yesterday when I reached home, she was already asleep. Gonna rush home today.

Babyyyyy. Are you coming to fetch me from work?? =D =D =D

2010-03-08T16:43:00.002+08:00

Decided to ask Peishan out only in the evening.
Met at Vivo City. Brought Love there by bus.
She shouted out loud, 'Byeeee. See youuuu.' when I stood up from the seat. -.-!!
Got a few replies back though. Lol!
Walked around, she was quite afraid of Peishan initially, but after that she allowed to be carried by her, hugged her and even kissed. Haha.
Playground, Pet Safari, Timezone, those kiddy machines then to food court for dinner after Baby reached.
Haagen-Dazs for ice cream. Went to meet Cheewei after that then headed back to my home cos Love's getting sleepy.
Went to Cheewei's place for mahjong until I don't know what time, 2am?
Home, slept. Had a little difficulty waking up, the 5more mins thing again. Lol..

I love hugging Baby in the morning. (:

2010-03-07T13:55:00.002+08:00

A private post, something I've wanted to blog about long ago, but just to myself.

2010-03-07T11:03:00.002+08:00

Mommy brought Love to Grandmother's place yesterday.
Baby and I had our own time.
Headed down to Orchard. Not knowing what to do..
Spent an hour at Borders, he's with the car magazines and I'm with the romance novels.
Stuck at carpark cos we don't know what to do, where to go.
Decided to just roam around shopping centres then settled at Wisma's Starbucks.
Read newspapers, saw the movies section.
Went down to Balestier for a Shaw movie, Alice In Wonderland.
Had combo C and the popcorn was hugeeeee. But we managed to finish it then felt sick after the movie. Haha!
Passed by Lornie Road so we dropped by Cheewei's place since we actually decided to meet up with them but cancelled. Probably stayed there for an hour.

Before we headed off to Orchard, some unhappiness between us. Not really before, its throughout. Idk why. Sighhhh.

Baby's out in the morning for his photoshoot.. I'm suppose to bring Love out today.
But whereeeeeee~

2010-03-03T12:03:00.004+08:00

I've got my desktop in office.~ ^^

I actually have things to blog about, but I just don't have the time to.
After I reached home between 7.30pm and 8pm, its dinner time, then a little bit of tv, playing around with Love, bath then sleeping time! Its a routine like this for all weekdays which Baby's kinda getting pissed cos I always fall asleep but I'm trying not to already okay! =D
Weekends is quality time with Baby and Love respectively.
Thus! No time to blog, or rather even to use the computer unless at work! Hahaha.

Last weekend was the first for me after I start work. Last friday @ 6.30pm totally felt like heaven. Lol!
We went to Sandy's daughters' birthday party at her place. Initially had this drift session at Malaysia but Baby went with me for my programme instead. Thanks Baby! There were quite alot of people, definitely alot of toddlers. It was the first time for me meeting Charlene. They look pretty in their dresses, although I think Phoebe's was a little big for her that the pearls as a strap kept dropping off her shoulders but she was clever to know how to put it up. As I think if it's Love, she would probably just pull down the whole dress. Literally LOL at Amberlyn when she accidentally let go of Phoebe's Barney balloon and tried to chase after it. She has really grown up. Actually Love too, but as the saying goes, your child will always be like a baby to you. (:
Celebration and all. Cake cutting. Love was so into the happy birthday song cos we always sing that with her at home since her birthday and she would say her own name VelVel. But no one heard when we were singing for Phoebe and Charlene I hope.

As of Sunday.. Joined Baby's friends for a Subaru(actually not exactly just that name) convey for their friend's Malay wedding. Atrocious, so many cars. Wasn't exactly like a convey I felt, and halfway through, don't even know where is the wedding car. -.- & it was freaking hot. All of us headed straight to the drinks after reaching. Hahahaha. Actually I find that Malay weddings are really nice, although they are at void decks, and plastic chairs and normal tables, they wrapped it up with beautiful cloths and nice catering food. =D
Somerset 313 with Love after that. Walked around for the whole 3hours. First time there. Country bumpkin?
Then to Queensway Shopping Centre to get Love's shoes which he took a very long time choosing. Wanted to head down to Sengkang cos DG people were there flying kites, then Mommy called and ask if its convenient for us to fetch them from Mustafa. Here and there, we met DG people at 11+pm, birthday cake cutting for Mark, then we left in a while.. To Thomson Road for little pot noodles. (: Slept on the way home.
Baby gave me a little surprise by bringing back my sony ericsson phone, got the neccessary items needed, charged the battery and passed it to me. THANKS!!

Okay.. There are probably nothing much to blog about for these weekdays. So this is going to be a long one with I think maybe .. 2 topics?, or rather just some stuff that I want to rant about.

(1)
Although I'm kind of getting used to the crowd in the train, and the squeezing here and there, I adhore China women now. Or is it China people, regardless the gender? Whatever.
In a single trip to work on one morning, One China lady rested her whole body on the pole in the middle of the train when I was about to hold it cos I nearly felled. She knew that I wanted to hold it, she could still looked at me, then just looked away. -.-!!
Another China woman came in the train, and she stepped on my toes with her heels! Yes, the back of her heels! Then she just looked at me and turned away, without even apologising. Like as if my feet are blocking her way and she is right to do so! Zzzzz.

(2)
I came across this ex couple. She left him for another guy. But from the way she talks to him, it felt like flirting, it seemed like she still wants his attention. Is the girl being a bitch, or is it that she just wants to remain as friends with him? As for the guy, is he just plain stupid, or just blinded by love?

I'm so looking forward to weekends!~ 2 more days~ ^^

2010-02-25T14:53:00.003+08:00

In office now.
Had the time to use the computer while the colleague has more important things to do than training me. ^^

Woke up this morning and Mommy told me that Grandmother fell down last night, asked me if I heard anything because it happened right outside my room door but I did not, probably because I was sleeping like a log. =D
Went to Grandmother's room to take a look at her and the injury freaked me out. Her forehead above her left eye was swollen and black. Through the night, the blood flowed down to her left eye, thus making it the same as well. So she has black and swollen forehead and left eye. I had the urge not to go to work because I was afraid that Mommy couldn't cope with Love and Grandmother if she needs to bring her to the doctor. But Mommy said she could handle, probably ask one of my aunts down or something.
Called Mommy from office just now, she said Dad's going to drive all of them there to the clinic and either one of them would have to carry Love. Sigh. Don't even know if Dad could handle Love.

Gonna go home in another 3 and 1/2 more hours.
I miss you Love and Baby.

2010-02-23T14:22:00.003+08:00

Today's my 2nd day at work.
Yes, I'm blogging in the office. Hahaha.
I'm not eating snake okay, I just got granted a free day to use the computer, to do whatever I want, (just finished watching shows on youtube) because both of my colleagues are not in the office and apparently he doesn't trust me with all this accounting work, afraid I'll screw it up or something. SO! Happy me today.. Praying hard that the phone doesn't ring, cos I have to pick up if it does. =X

On the first day of work,
Baby gave me a red packet for good luck. (: Thanks Baby!
I got lost. -.- I got down 1 stop later then I should have.
Then I walked all the way back in the hot sun. Thus, late for 15 minutes.
I'm not exactly doing admin work only, but accounting also.
Nevermind, at least I get to learn new things.
For the whole day, I was just sitting beside the guy whom I'm suppose to learn from.
I yawned, I nearly fell asleep.
I know I have to focus and learn what he's doing, but the program that he's using is giving him problems and he can't print out anything. He spent the whole morning, 3 hours trying to print. Then in the afternoon also. I literally stoned there.
Boss gave me red packet. Happy happy.
Counted down to 6.30pm and I left on the dot. =X
Called Baby and he gave me a surprise by appearing behind me. Hehehs.
It really cheered me up after hours of sitting there learning almost nothing. Love you!

Colleagues are nice. There's only two that I'm communicating with. Hope I will be a fast learner.
*Prays hard.

Reached home and I'm so glad to see Lovelle. She's delighted to see me. Even when she drank milk, she called out for my name and Mommy was like so surprised. Because usually she will look for my mom instead of me when I was at home. Now that I'm out of her sight for more than eight hours, she's missing meeeee! & I taught her to say 'miss you' last night. ^^

Went with Baby to BukitTimah to meet his friends.. Had mango&kiwi dessert. One of his friends, Neo brought his wife and son along. He is so adorable, I almost forgot how to play with a 1year old baby. I expected him to give me more reactions cos I'm used to Love. Lol! Left earlier than usual. Thanks Baby for understanding that I'm really tired.

Once we reached home, Love woke up. Mommy says she seems to know that we're reaching home. Cos she cried suddenly during her sleep, or is it because of nightmare? Haha!

There seem to always not enough time for my sleep. =X Would be really lazy and tired in the morning when the alarm rang.

Baby, you better keep your promise of sending me near to office everyday once you get your daily car. =D

2010-02-21T22:04:00.003+08:00

I'm going to start work tomorrow, 22/01/2010.
Considered, the first time I'm working.
Getting pretty nervous, hope I won't get bullied there. Haha!
Found out that the building I'm working in is just opposite, a road away from Baby's friend's company.
That made me feel better, at least someone I know in the vicinity. (:

Jiayou Michelle!
You got to work for the sake of Love.
This is what I've been telling myself constantly.

2010-02-20T14:19:00.002+08:00

Lan with Baby and two of his friends, Teckmeng and Weezhun. He told me that we will be going to the one opposite Parklane. Thought I wouldn't need to step in that shopping centre, but we still did.
Things running through my mind. Lots of things. ):

Besides that.
They were playing L4D2, I didn't.
Bought McDonalds instead, lucky me cos they were closing and I'm the last person.
Walked back and saw a few people standing outside another lanshop smoking openly.
Thought back, I used to be like that too. =X

Played for two hours and left for home.

Mommy's out with Love.
Going to Ah Heng's place later on with Baby.
(:

Lovelle's 2nd Birthday Celebration

2010-02-17T18:26:00.019+08:00

Finally I had all the photos of Love's 2nd Birthday sorted out.
I had deleted all those that are unglam, blurred/out of focus and those that I don't even know what's the subject. (:
Love's 2nd Birthday Celebration
5th February 2010
Holland Swensens
Again, special thanks to Michelle&Benjamin, Qianhui&Junming, Peishan&Cheewei, Tracy, Pearl, Yuki and Yuting for your time to celebrate her birthday. Thanks to Michelle and Yuting for the red packets, and Qianhui&Junming, Yuki, Tracy and Pearl for the presents. (: & of course, my aunts for the presents which they prepared much earlier.

Love was cranky the whole night through out once she saw unfamiliar faces. She didn't want people to touch her, let alone carry her. She did not even want to sit down her her high chair but did so only after I gave her the camera to meddle with. She cried almost the whole night, okay, not really when she has the camera to play with and once there are fries given to her and when she saw the cake right in front of her with the candles and us singing the birthday song. Speaking of which, there are a few photos below that are taken by Love. I will leave a caption there to note which was taken by her.

Trying to show the person sitting in front of her which I think is Qianhui the screen on the camera of what she has taken.

Baby's fav, cos it has mango. ^^

Seeeeee! Happily eating fries.

Showing Yuki that she has finished her fries and she wants more by showing her empty mouth. -.-

Qianhui&Junming's present for Love.

Open a small hole at the wrapping paper and passed to Love hoping that it would calm her down cos she was crying. Asked her what's inside, and she shouted ELMO which cracked us up.

There! Taken by Love. Only half the face of Yuting.

Is Love a potential photographer or what? Hahaha.

Love's birthday cake. Cookies&Cream icecream cake.

Got this for free...

My expressions because its so difficult to cut an icecream cake. I don't know how to cut a cake also, I only know how to mess it up. Lol.

Filial Love, feeding Mommy. Hahahaha.

Seeeeeeeeeee. So tam jiak. Open mouth so wide.

Satisfactory look. LOL.

Peishan trying to win Love over by games in her Iphone.

After the celebration, Peishan&Cheewei came back with us to our place for Love to open her presents.

So happy to be with her grandmother. Hahaha.

My happy daughter with her presents. (:

On Love's 2nd birthday, Mommy asked me.
Do you think her dad would at least sms you, wishing her a happy 2nd birthday?
I shrugged and said I don't know.
True enough, there isn't anything.
Not that I'm expecting something, but this goes to show that she's out of his life, and maybe I shouldn't worry any longer that he might come back and want her someday?

A true dad isn't just about blood ties.
A true dad is someone who really takes care of her and discipling her when she has done something wrong.
Do you agree Baby? (:

2010-02-13T13:28:00.002+08:00

Baby went home for reunion dinner yesterday.

FIRST TIME OUT WITH BROTHER.
Only the both of us, went bugis, shopping for my things. (:
Basically, I bought clothes for work, I'll just wear one of it for cny.
A pair of heels from Charles&Keith.
1 skirt, 1 pants, 1 cardigan, 1 pair of leggings and I think 6 tops/dresses, from bugis street. ^^
Spent 3 hours there, Bro bought some pork with asparagus before heading home which tasted not bad and I bought apple juice from Cold's Storage for him, as to thank him for shopping with me? Hahaha.

Got really crazy while shopping. But while on the way back home in the car, thinking back, wow. I've spent alot. Lol.
Saw.. Michelle and Yuting. Kinda creepy cos right before we reached Bugis, I was talking to Bro about the both of them.

I'm so going to ask my bro along for shopping in future. (:

2010-02-11T18:27:00.004+08:00

I already kept my mouth shut when he doesn't give me allowance(I'm not working yet not even more pathetic?),
but still does for my brother who is in NS and has that pathetic $500(?).
I'm trying to be an understanding daughter, not to give him pressure.

Now even for this once a year cny clothes, bro has it and I have none.
Reason : Cos I have a daughter.
What the fuck is the link?

2010-02-08T14:19:00.007+08:00

Couple of things to blog about.
Photos of Love's 2nd birthday will be posted in the next, I hope.

Firstly! Thanks to my neighbour for the biscuits given to Love cos of her birthday. I know you can see this since you found out about her birthday from here also. ^^

Met up with Qianhui and Junming at Downtown East at .. 11pm.+
Her friend's birthday.

There's a girl who kept staring.
Apparently, I think I know who she is.
She's trying to figure out if I'm someone she knows too.
But. The thing is, she looks really unfriendly, stares not only at me but at the rest of us.
Made loud comments like, She looks like Michelle leh. Why she look so old now ah? -.-!! (Cos I'm a mother now!)
She also asked her friend who was talking to us, Do you know that girl? the one in white.
On purpose, trying to let me hear that she's asking about me. Hmm..
Actually I kinda recognised her, but she looks like she's looking for trouble. So I just kept quiet, though in my mind wondering did I offend her in the past, few years back. =X

Okay, that's not the point of purpose why I wanna blog about that day.
Went Esplanade with them after that.
Girls talk with Qianhui.
Our guys got really bored, no more topics to talk about, and they fell asleep. LOL.
Sometimes, some girls would know each other through their boyfriends.
Some may click, some may not.
Thinking back, I actually don't have female friends who stay in contact after either relationships ended.
Honestly, the first time I met Qianhui, yes she's friendly, but I never thought we would have so much to talk about!
Until the guys complained that they have been neglected, and we say, give us 5 more minutes, or let me finish this topic first! (:
Had tiffs between both couples. Tears from the both of us, hugs from each other. Liked that. Not the tiffs, not the tears, but the hugs. Haa.
We chatted for a whole 3 hours I think. Then we headed home only after Junming suddenly woke up, hugged Qianhui, patted his chest and said that he was afraid she left. How sweet is that? (:
Sorry baby, for flaring at you. I would just get really sensitive at that issue. Sorry, I'll try to do something about it within me.

Kallang then to Turf City for steamboat dinner with DG people.

Went to Giant.
Bought only chocolate initally but saw that at the counter.
Remembered the times when Bro and I always wanted to buy this when we were young, I can't remember the reason why Mommy doesn't always buy for us.
Now it only cost 99cents. FOR TWO. Buy one and get one free. (:
Thanks baby, though it only cost 99 cents, but still, thanks! Loves!

Love's funny funny actions again.

She took one biscuit from the table, I wasn't paying attention to her.
She says nah, as if wanting to feed me, I turned to her, she quickly put it into her mouth and grinned. Then she raised thumbs up and tell me, nice, good.
After that, she took the whole packet and sat beside the bed. Minutes later, she came back, trying to take the other packet. I asked her, where is the other one, she pointed to me the empty one at the floor and told me, no more.
Hahahaha.

2010-02-06T11:18:00.002+08:00

In the day on her birthday.
Brought her outside the house, played with her neighbours.
That's the meimei that she has been calling out to, screaming almost everyday from our gate.

2010-02-05T10:31:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY TO LOVELLE!

Love is 2 years old!
It still seems pretty young, a toddler, she still has many more years to primary school, to teenage years.
But thinking back to all the small and little things these two years.
The first time I had physical contact with her, I held her in my arms.
The first time she opens her eyes, cos she had her eyes closed at the time in the hospital.
The first time she gripped my finger.
The first time she smiles at me.
The first time she makes noise besides crying.
The first time she knows how to grip something.
The first time she flips from back to front and vice versa.
The first time she could hold her head straight.
The first time she could sit up still.
The first time she started crawling.
The first time she learnt how to hold the bottle herself.
The first time when she ate solid food.
The first time when she laughed out loud.
The first time she could stand with support.
The first time she could stand without support.
The first step she took.
The first time she could walk freely without support, with confidence.
WOW.

There are many more first times.
Now that she learnt how to says from 1 to 10.
She 'orders' me to put things where she wants it to be.
When she goes out, she would get her shoes ready, tell me gai gai, bye bye, see you. -.-
She sings along to abc song and ends with now my abc.
She recognises things, from pictures also ; from animals like giraffe and horse to things like flower and towel.
& many many more!
As her mother, I really feel that she's very clever. To know all these at the age of 2. (:

Last night, she was really hyper when Mommy kept singing happy birthday to her.
She was jumping and leaping on the bed, around the room.
& this morning when she woke up, I told her Happy Birthday Lovelle, you're 2 years old.
She blur blur, stoned. Haha. Wonders if she understands what's the meaning of birthday.

Having dinner at Swensens as birthday celebration.
Then bringing the cake back from Swensens to my place to cut.
Hope she doesn't gets too scared with people and burst out crying or something. =X
*fingers crossed*

Next update would be photos from the celebration, I hope.

Lovelle, Mommy loves you. (:

2010-02-04T14:40:00.006+08:00

Taken these photos quite a while back.
Want to save these memorable times in here. (:
Baby was complaining of my duper long hair. He WANTS me to get it cut.
'Persuaded' me and ya.
Right before cutting, had photos taken so I can see it if I miss the length. =X

But after the cut, quite satisfied with the after-length.
Looks neat right, in the photos.
Cos its right after the cut. Hours later, not like that anymore. ): Haha!

There there! Baby's right there behind me at the counter paying. XD

I know I took too long, it took us 2 hours for the cut, Baby was pretty bored. But still sat beside me. Thanks Baby.. For the haircut, and for sitting there with me. You'd better be with me still when I perm/rebond in future, that would take much more than just 2 hours. Hee.

2010-02-02T17:37:00.002+08:00

Pretty busy week. Or rather, I have something to do almost everyday.

Wednesday - Paya Lebar to sign job appointment letter.
Thursday - ChinaTown with Baby, might be bringing Love.
Friday - LOVE'S 2ND BIRTHDAY! Swensens for dinner.
Saturday - Zoo(?) with family.
Sunday - Steamboat(?) with Baby and his friends.

It feels good to have my days packed and planned with things to do. (:

2010-02-02T12:41:00.003+08:00

Baby, Love, Mommy and I went Grandma's place at yishun on Sunday.

Had Love's pre birthday celebration dinner at some place.

Fascinated with this 'long gang' fish(guppy) catching with a net thing that cost $10.
With no time limit, although it says only 5 fishes are allowed per tank but I see that nobody cares. It also ways that its for kids 3-12 years old and parents are not allowed to help but I see adults in the pond. LOL. Me and Baby included. =X The normal colours of the fishes are like .. Black/Grey and Red/Orange? But I spotted one that is Black with White spots, (or vice versa?). Its so pretty laaa. Then it swam away, I was cursing. Baby then went to search for it and caught it in like minutes later. Hehe. But after that, Cousin brought it home. Hopes it would be there like for long or something so when Love grows up a little bit more, gonna bring her there. (:

2010-01-28T18:32:00.005+08:00

Lots of photos in camera.
Some day out with Lovelle.
Can't remember the date anymore, but to Bugis. (:

2010-01-18T16:34:00.002+08:00

Went in Malaysia a few days back, with him and his friends.
First time in Malaysia without family, and with him. (:
Pretty interesting, fun friends to be with, nice drifting to see and rides to be in, delicious food, and of course GREAT sunburn and waiting at workshop for the cars to be done.
We left home at 6.45am and reached home only at 12am?
Love was so delighted when she saw us, was literally jumping up and down. Haha. That's heart-melting. ^^
Took alot of photos but all are cars. -.- Was told that I was video-ed, think its the one when I got in the ride and out being unable to walk straight. =X
But gotta think twice if he were to ask me along again in the future, was feeling really uncomfortable due to the heat.

As for today!
Gotten 2 calls, asking me to go for interview tomorrow.
*prays hard.
One is at Tuas, and the other at Upper Paya Lebar.
Lol. If were to work at Tuas, it would be so convenient to enter Malaysia. Lol.

Regarding Love's 2nd birthday, was thinking of celebrating at home initially, then we thought of booking a chalet at Sentosa, but now Mommy says don't waste money, rather just stay at home. HMM.. Could book a chalet someday after I'm stable in a job for Love also right? See how see how.

Spaghetti for dinner tonight. (:

2010-01-11T16:40:00.003+08:00

This is never what I wanted.
I never wanted my daughter to not have a father.
I wanted so much for my daughter to have a complete family.
Who doesn't?
But circumstances don't allow me to.
It wasn't life to be together with him.
Selfish?, but I believe we can have a better life without him.

I watched a drama series recently.
She's not married. She lied to her 5 year old son that her dad's in space when he asked.
I thought, I cried.
What am I suppose to tell Lovelle when she asks in the future?
I just hope she will understand my explaination then.

Yes, I chose Douglas to be my boyfriend, hopefully Lovelle's dad.
Many things happened in the past, and as I said, its the past.
Its time I have to let go of the past and start afresh with him.
I don't know how long will I take, but at least I know I have to.
Maybe many will look down upon our relationship, would say it will not work.
But its between me and him. We want to make it work.

---------------------------------

Lovelle's 2nd birthday is approaching.
Should I hold a celebration and invite friends, or just a family thing?

2009-12-28T22:04:00.000+08:00

I'm still sick.
Lovelle's having flu now.

Yes BF, I LOVE HIGH HEELS, though I suck at walking in it. XD

For relationship wise, it was going all the way down. Till it hit the bottom of the pit. I know you're trying to salvage the whole thing, I know you're proving to me that you've changed. I felt it too. But is it going to be like this, for now and always? No one knows. I told you before, that I'm afraid of taking the risk again. So afraid. Probably time would make things clearer for me. As for now, I really appreciate everything you've done for me. Helping me out with Lovelle, washing up the dirty dishes for me, getting me shirts and all. (:

2009-12-19T03:13:00.002+08:00

2009-12-14T19:40:00.002+08:00

Great. Phone is spoilt.
Gotta repair it someday but I just can't find the warranty card. SIGH.

Things aren't going on that well for me lately.
Grandma's sick.
Brother is in camp, he can't help much. Well, even if he books out, it doesn't make much of a difference cos he doesn't share much of the responsibility.
Dad .. no words to describe.
SO! Apparantly, I'm the only one Grandma can rely on. Usually I could do my own things when Love takes her nap in the afternoons. I could either sleep with her, or use the laptop. But now.. Gotta be with her in the living room. Not that I'm complaining! But it just pisses me off when I ask Dad to do a simple thing for me which she asked me to do but I can't cos I got to feed Love, etc and he could just tell me he's watching the television now. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK! DAMN!
Okay, just pray that Grandma gets well soon cos she's been telling us that she feels like she's going to die anytime. >.<

What else..
Oh right, had a friend who is going to divorce. ): I pity him, and the kids. I don't understand what the fuck that woman is doing. Marriage is for fun? Oh I love you, I have your kid, I marry you. Then, you're not giving me enough money, I don't love you anymore, I love another guy, I want a divorce. This is so WHAT THE FUCK AGAIN. & a mommy who wants freedom and don't want her kids after divorce? Shame on you. People like you are the ones who made others think that young mommies are hopeless and all. Your kids don't deserve all this shit.
To my friend, I hope you will stay strong, for yourself, and for your kids. Really, they are your kids. Please, give them the best you can.

2009-12-09T21:25:00.002+08:00

I always give in my all in every single relationship.
I trusted every of them wholeheartedly.
Yes, some may have ended nicely.
But some ..
Yet I've never learnt my lessons.

You used to tell me you're too honest in every of your relationships till at the end of the day, you are the one who gets cheated. ALWAYS.
If its really true .. Then why do I have to be the unlucky one, to be the first to get cheated by you? What have I done to deserve this?, this irritating shadow following me, reminding about everything now and then. You want things between us to be as normal, you don't want me to irritate you about all my thoughts. Do you really think that things could be back to normal? Do you really think that I could forget about the whole god damn thing? I just kept it to myself. Tears falling every night, do you know? You don't. Then you are going to say, 'Why don't you tell me? How would I know if you don't tell me.'. It's a cycle. If I tell you, you're going to tell me that you're feeling really uncomfortable about it.
Everything is still fresh in my mind. It seems like it just happened yesterday. The hurt I'm feeling.. Its excruciating. I want to hold on to us. But quarrels everyday, its affecting my confidence about the both of us.
Do you really love me? Please don't play me out. The fear is building, its never ending.

2009-12-08T18:41:00.004+08:00

Went Pasir Ris with family about a week back? Brought the kids (Love and cousins) to KidsExplorer. Signed up membership for Love at $5.50. Could last till she turns 12. 1st hour cost $11. If without membership, it costs effing average $20 for pathetic one hour.

Nothing much actually, except the tunnel playground and the two enclosed areas full with plastic balls. Others have additional cost.

The one we were at in the photo above is actually for 3 and above. & for KIDS. So basically I wasn't allowed to be in there laaa. Love also. But its much more nicer with the lights than the plain coloured balls. Hehehe.

Oh oh! There's this holiday package for members. $15 for unlimited time but there's no re-entry for the kids and .. 2 free tickets for the mini ferris wheel in the building which actually cost $6.50 each I think. (: So MOMMIES OUT THERE, bring your kids there this holiday! ^^

Just a small update on what Love has learnt, has been doing..

She tells us water when she wants after her milk.

She knows how to tell us put here and put there. Especially food, she would tap the table in front of her and say. -.-!!

Whenever we came back from outside, when we help to take out her shoes, she would squeeze her nose and say chou chou. Zzzzzz.

She's just getting more and more mischievous lah. Lol..

Had a hard time trying to find a photo with the all of us! LADIES! When are we meeting up!? Okay lah, partly my fault also cos I have Love to take care of and I always say I can't make it. =X But I REALLLYYYY MISS THE ALL OF YOU! LOVES! ^^

2009-11-26T14:37:00.001+08:00

I was cooking noodles in the afternoon yesterday, dad was eating in the living room, looking after lovelle also.
Then I heard laughter from my dad.
Went out to see what's going on, and the photo explains everything.
Mischievous lovelle crawled under the sofa, wanting to take her shoe, then she got stuck, shouting out for help. -.-
New weird stunts by her every other day. I guess I have to agree with people's comments that she's really active and naughty, not like other kids. ><

Got woken up by deardear's calls this noon. He had a 2hour lunch break, so! Travelled in such a hot weather, came down to my place and bought lunch for me. :)
Thanks for making the effort deardear! Love you!

Random, bro's coming back this saturday. Wonders if he would buy anything back. Suppose he would get chocolates for cousins, I think. Haha!

2009-11-21T15:15:00.001+08:00

Deardear had sudden cravings for tang yuan, went to chinatown the other night, searched for it while drizzling. Till we gave up.
Went sheng siong the next day, bought the one with peanut filling, cooked it right before he made his way down. Told him I prepared something for him and yup!
He did not seem as happy and surprised as I thought he would be though.. Idiot! Hahaha. Nevermind! At least I know it myself that I made the effort to try to surprise him. Hee.
Kallang to meet his Subaru friends. Bugis, clarke quay, then chee wei's place for mahjong, which I got laughed at cos I know nuts about playing and initially the plan was peishan and I as a player but she was busy with her own stuff.
Hmm.. At least I won once. :D
Fell asleep on the way home. X.X Deardear as usual, held my hand. :)

The night didn't really end well, I just hope none of those sorts anymore. Please.

Gonna bring love out later in the evening! Chee wei's 21st birthday celebration at his place. Think she would enjoy herself, with all the kids there. :)
Now that love is taking a nap, and looks like an angel, I kinda miss her mischievous stunts. Lol! Which I think would happen in another hour. Shall nap with her too..

2009-11-20T12:24:00.001+08:00

I´ve been letting you down, down
Girl I know I've been such a fool
Giving in to temptation
When I should´ve played it cool
The situation got out of hand
I hope you understand

Chorus
It can happen to..
Anyone of us, anyone you think of
Anyone can fall
Anyone can hurt someone they love
Hearts will break
´Cause I made a stupid mistake
It can happen to..
Anyone of us, say you will forgive me
Anyone can fail
Say you will believe me
I can´t take my heart will break
´Cause I made a stupid mistake
A stupid mistake

She was kind of exciting
A little crazy I should´ve known
She must have altered my senses
´Cause I offered to walk her home
The situation got out of hand
I hope you understand

Chorus

A stupid mistake
she means nothing to me
(nothing to me)
I swear every word is true
don´t wanna lose you

Chorus to fade

Deardear.. Just sing this song to me, will you?

We are back together,
I decided to close two eyes, and carry on.
I just hope this would be the first and last stupid mistake.
It would be much tougher now, criticism from friends, from family and relatives.
Lets just hold hands and face this together alright?
I know there are some things that you are unhappy about, just give me time alright. I don't see the point of quarrelling anymore, the fact that we could still be together after that incident.
But my trust for you, please give me time. I can't possibly trust you wholeheartedly again, so hope you could understand when I doubt you at times.
I love you and I really wish to always be the only star in your heart. :)

2009-11-16T20:44:00.001+08:00

Thanks for all the concern you people have been giving me.
Those tags are really comforting, even from passerbys.
Unfortunately, I can't reply tags yet, without a laptop.
Something to be happy about, congratulations to joss mommy on giving birth to maphius safely. :)

I.. Don't know what to blog anymore. Everything that happened recently just can't be described with words. I don't know what words to use. Sigh.

2009-11-07T14:43:00.001+08:00

This would most probably the last post I'll blog about you, I hope.

It was suppose to be our place, a place with our happy memories. But you brought her there.
It was suppose to be our song, the song we liked when we first heard it together. But you sent her the lyrics.
I'm supposed to be the only girl you should impress with your car and driving skills but sad to say, its her again.
I was silly to believe you were at home sleeping, but you were with her.
Although I said I don't know how to trust you, but I still did. Yet it turned out like that. I heard many things about you, it suck.
I did not do anything wrong, but to your friends, it seem like I'm at fault, like I'm the one who had the change of heart. Little did they know that, I was still kept in the dark that time.
I told myself to move on. I reminded myself repeatedly.
But I couldn't help myself but to look out my kitchen window always, to see if you might be there, to surprise me. I never needed to rush there to wave goodbye anymore.
I know I shouldn't be like this, but I could hardly eat a meal a day now. I know I have to eat. I know. But the appetite just isn't there. Not even favourite ice cream.
I really did my best to quit smoking. I cut down alot.
I smoke at the most two sticks a day. I don't smoke in front of friends, and you too, after you told me you hate the smell.
But you told her its okay to smoke in your car, like how you told me, initially.
Do you know, whatever I do, it reminds me of you? Its anything and everything.
I listen to radio now, cos I'm used to it when you were driving.
Even just looking around my room, hugging my pillow, I thought of you again.
Lovelle misplaced her pacifier again. Then I recalled the time when I was searching it frantically, I raised my voice at you if you could help. You came in, you found it in less than a minute. I looked at that place beside the mattress, it is there. I smiled to myself.
Songs remind me of you too.
I'm glad that the places you brought me to, its only reachable by private transport. So I could avoid those places.

Put the betrayal and lies aside, I really felt your love for me.
You wanted to meet me every single day, *oh well, I should have noticed that something's wrong since you stopped meeting me at night. Sigh.*
You brought me to wherever I want, fetched us back from my relative's place, bought milk powder for lovelle, *though after that you badmouth me and my mom in front of her that we are using you, which you always ask me not to think this way cos you love me*
You satisfy my cravings, drove around, looking for carrot cake, for bout 3 hours, then surprise me by going out to check if there is and order first cos I fell asleep in the car.
You make me feel secure when we held hands while we were at expressway, and I fall asleep, you didn't let go of my hand, instead it was troublesome for you to change gears and drive with just one hand.
You've made me happy with all other little things you've done.

But..
One decision of yours ruined my everything. I've never cried so badly in my life. Friends have been consoling and comforting, I really have to let go. Because, I wouldn't want someone who betrayed me. Thanks for appearing in my life, and letting me have a lesson learnt.

2009-11-04T13:59:00.001+08:00

And not forgetting to mention, the one hug that lovelle initiatied when I was crying. She's such a sweet daughter. She came to me, she hugged me, and tapped my back. Thanks lovelle.. I love you. You will always be my top priority. :)

2009-11-04T13:46:00.001+08:00

These few days have been very long for me. Now to think back, it doesn't feel realistic. Okay, nevermind, at least I know the truth now..

It felt so terrible till I had to find company. Stayed over at tracy's place two nights back, had mcdelivery.
*Thanks bf*.. Thanks for accompanying me, and even skipped school cos you didn't wanna wake me up, came over to my place so I could rest a while with you helping me to look after lovelle.
*Thanks michelle* for calling after knowing something happened. Received messages in the evening, I cried so hard, till you called the rest of the ladies down.
*Thanks yuting* for coming down although you've already reached home from school.
*Thanks pearl* for making it to my place after your dance practice, when you're so tired and sick, and the chocolates.
*Thanks isaac, weilong and tommy* for the concern.
*Thanks jasmine* for reminding me that I could call you if I need someone.
*Thanks cindy and tingting* for the tags.

This is what a single mom has to face.
I know, I've to be strong.

2009-11-02T10:25:00.001+08:00

We thought we're the one for each other. Or maybe, its only me who thought this way. I don't know what happened. I called you countless times during that 29hours, messaged you, telling you how worried am I, and if you don't pick up, means a breakup. But it all doesn't work. I thought something happened to you. Until I called your friend, and he told me you just asked him out. At that moment, I froze, literally. So all along, you avoided my calls, when I tried so hard in vain like a fool. What went wrong? I don't know. Perhaps its wrong even to start in the first place. Maybe it should be just me and lovelle. Cos guys say that they could accept her out of impulse. As time goes by ... Everything ends with tears. Like now.

2009-11-01T03:41:00.001+08:00

I miss her long hair, compared to now. :( don't she look cuter with the bottom of her hair curled in towards the face at both sides? Hahaha.

Ohya! Getting so annoyed at those vehicles with loud engines, those that once you hear it, you would know its modified. Lovelle has been awaken, crying badly by that noise countless times when she's having her afternoon naps. Damn. Don't they spare a thought for others? Doubt they do.

What else.. Anticipating for the day to explore chubbs' home, and to return her the stuff she left in my bag the other day! :)

Sometimes I wonder, is there even anyone reading my blog? My tagboard seems stagnant. Lol..

2009-10-31T14:11:00.001+08:00

Love this photo! With my four beloved ladies. :)

Tracy BF's birthday celebration. Dinner, jap food at yishun. Blueberry cheesecake. Four g-strings from the four of us. Henderson waves to chill. And of course, tonnes of photos!

BF, hope you enjoyed your day. Although it was kind of ruined by my problems, my tears, which led to you crying.

Ladies, thanks for the hugs and the concern, I really felt it.

2009-10-29T13:10:00.001+08:00

Ohya! Wanted to blog these photos that was taken long ago when I met up with dearest xueting. But didn't have the chance to. But just one now ya.

Lovelle's first interaction with an ang moh boy! Hahaha. They are really cute, playing together. He tried to teach lovelle how to jump down from a really low step. He told her where to put her legs and where to hold when they are on the seesaw. Adorable to the max! Handsome lil boy too uh? Lol!

2009-10-28T03:06:00.001+08:00

Aww.. Isn't she cute? Looks a little like a boy when she was young uh? Was looking through my photos in phone. Hahaha.

Lovelle lovelle lovelle.. Piss me off so much at times, but hearing her call me mommy ever so clearly melts all anger. Now I really understand how elated it feels when being called mommy by your very own child. :)

Btw! Jasmine(jehm)! Was heading towards grandma's place at yishun with my mom and lovelle. Aunt and cousins headed there too. So kind of inconvenient if were to leave and meet you ya. Will call you up if I happen to be there with bf k!

Hope dear gets well soon! Hope the quarrels will end and not continue on and on. Hope my trust for him could still exist.

2009-10-25T19:03:00.004+08:00

Photos taken today at MacRitchie bus stop, while waiting for bus to Yishun, Grandma's place. Was trying to blog the photos straight from my phone. & could finally work! but must with photos though, just like MMS. Love it.

Looks feminine eh?

No idea what's with this pose. Looks cute though. Hehehs.

Actually took lots of photos, but don't wanna waste too much money on mms-ing when I could actually blog for free with a laptop/computer. ):

2009-10-16T02:42:00.000+08:00

It sucks to be able to blog only after midnight cos the wireless i'm tapping is only available then. :(
I'm trying very hard to activate the blog on the go thing. Blogging via sms or something. But it just doesn't seem to work. Damn.

Ohya. Bro's wooden frame bed just collapsed this evening, great. So all of us will be sleeping on mattresses on the floor, thick ones though. He'll be flying to Australia this tuesday for five weeks, for training. Would I miss him? Hahaha!

What else.. Ellie's son 1st birthday celebration on saturday, would be seeing cindy and joss. Great! :)

2009-10-12T23:20:00.003+08:00

Laptop's not with me.. :(
Something's wrong with my wifi in phone. Can't blog. :(
I'm still on earth! Not mars or on moon or something. Lol..
Using dear's phone now at kallang mac. Hahaha.

Lovelle's 20 months old now.
She always nods her head and say yeaaaa when I asked her if she wants to eat something or gai gai.
She knows how to call me mommy already, instead of mama. HAPPY!
She recognises Girlfriend and calls her ning ma, sounds like ing ma at times, and absolutely not clearer than mommy. HAHA!
She points to her butt then pinches her nose when she pooed.
And some weird habit of hers, when she's eating porridge, she will close her eyes and walk around. Siao right!
One last thing, she learnt how to say fishball! But it sounds like eee ball. -.-
Oh oh! She has learnt how to call daddy also. Hmm.. But i wonder if she knows what and who that means.

Okayokay! Last last thing! Dear! I love you! Hehe..

I won't be relinking and replying tags for the time being. Very hard to by using phone.. :)

Edited/
Lovelle had flu these few days. And she's so willing to take the medication, provided that someone claps for her after taking it. She would also remind the person by clapping herself. Totally no idea where she learnt this from. Needs to be praised so much! Zz..

A

2009-10-04T04:43:00.001+08:00

Alt

2009-09-21T18:43:00.002+08:00

Dear's friend got a Loreal hair mask for me cos the previous time we met up, we were talking about how dry my hair is. Was actually quite amazed by how nice can some people be. (: & I'm glad that I know friends like her.

& this got me thinking ...

Realised, I need friends, I need to feel belonged. I need to feel needed. If only I hadn't listened to him last year.. If only I stayed in contact with them. I guess things would be different now. I think, at least, we would be closer than what we are now? But everything's changed. I don't know why, but I just feel the awkardness when I chat with them. Or am I just thinking too much? Hmm..

2009-09-15T14:58:00.003+08:00

Kind of broke down in the afternoon on 10th Sept because Love just doesn't wanna listen to what I say and stuff. & thoughtful dear of mine passed me this in the night when we met up. He said its because of the smiley face on the bottle, and he thought it might cheer me up. Which really did. (:

Went for that event on Sunday at Kallang..

Was quite fascinated by the drift demos.

Especially the fact that one of the drivers is at the age of 50+?

Cool. Right dear?

Wasn't feeling quite well in the evening, perhaps because of the weather? Or taking of antibiotics with a not so full stomach. & dear wasted petrol for the air con so I could feel better. Thanks dear. Appreciated!

Car wash after we had our dinner!

Although its really tiring, arms aching and all, but just like the prawning session, its the bonding my dear! So don't feel bad of letting me wash your realllyyyy realllllyyyy dirty car.

Had a serious talk with dear yesterday. Was afraid that it would end.

Dear actually stopped what he was suppose to do at home and came down with lunch in his hands, to give me a surprise and to assure me that nothing like that is going to happen. & he wouldn't leave me. (: I love you dear!

I'm hoping. That everything would just stay this way. Everything quietened down. You live your life, and I live mine.

2009-09-14T22:15:00.002+08:00

Oh great, Love managed to crack the screen of laptop. -.-
Now I can only see less than half of the screen.
Moodless. Byebye.

2009-09-09T20:58:00.003+08:00

cindy , I emailed you my email already eh? o.O qiyin-@hotmail.com (:
joss , hahaha. if you add me in msn, you would see me online everyday, but yaa. lazy to blog laaa. though I still read the tags almost everyday. hehehe.
hello , what hubby? don't have one.
JEHM , hahahs. sure sure! after my infection. XD MISSES!

Went to Clementi Polyclinic yesterday for my insect bite, with Love.
Had to feed her bread while talking to the doctor cos she was making lots of noise.
When the doctor saw the swollen area, he was like..
'OH. Okay.. Good luck Michelle, you have to go to the hospital and do a minor operation.'
I was like O.O!!
Still, I requested for the antibiotics though he said that it help not actually help because its already infected.
When I left, he still repeated, 'Good luck ah Michelle, and cya.'
-.-!!
He's kinda nice doctor though. XD

As for today..
I woke up, realising that it had 'burst', with pus and blood on the bedsheet. >.<
Gross I know. Very disgusting right, dear? Hahaha.
Grandma says it should be okay, after everything comes out.
I hope so too.. I don't wanna be in the hospital.

I wanna go to some don't know what car drifting event or whatsoever car thing on Sunday. (:

2009-09-06T17:32:00.003+08:00

All have been linked. (:
Hmm.. Feels kind of weird to reply tags that were given 2 weeks back?

tag replies.

chubbs , I'm not lucky. *previous post* & IMY!
tingting , you gotta take good care of yourself, and ya, don't worry so much about your grandfather, he'll be fine. (:
barbiedo , hello! I'm not slim. I have fats on my tummy. I didn't do anything eh. In fact I eat alot, growing more fat really soon.
jehm , hahahs. I miss chatting with you, having heart to heart talks!
passerby , thanks. (:
namee , (: of course I remember who you are! thanks!
xueting , haha, thanks! okay.. tell me when there's a meetup then! I'll bring Lovelle along. (:

I'm not active in facebook. Created an account just for the sake of saving photos from some friends. Hahahs. Or maybe I should just accept friends' requests.?

Lovelle turned 19 months old yesterday! ^^
She loves yoghurt!
She learnt alot from her book,
points to the bread and says umm, milk and pretends to drink.
knows where are her hands and legs.
points to eyes and says eyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
She says ma-yi (money) when there are some on her hands.
She climbs up the chair to take the key and says key while holding it, and walk to the gate when we said lets go out, gai gai.
As usual, she watches advertisments, and pretends to take the food out of the tv and puts in her mouth and says ummm.
Watching elmo's song video is a must for her every morning she wakes up.
She says elmo when she wants to watch it, and says barney when she's wearing the shirt.
She smiles widely and says byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to me when I'm leaving house. But cries alot when Mommy leaves. -.- BUT. when she was frightened by the thunder last night while sleeping, she continues to cry when Mommy carried her, trying to stop her from crying, but all I did was just hold her in my arms and she stopped. Hmm.. Its the mother thing I guess. (: THAT'S WHY! NO ONE CAN REPLACE ME. NOT EVEN MY MOM, SO YOU OR YOUR MOM CAN'T TOO!

Alright! Now about me ..
I got an insect bite on my hip. ): Its really swollen and feels like blue black when touches it. But no! I'm not going to the doctor. Waste $ only. =D Great, Lovelle just poked it. Fcuk. & she got the cheek to frown at me cos she knows that its painful. Cheeky girl.

Then ..
Gotten into accident on Friday night. I'm fine, but like what Dear said, I was in a state of shock. Like duh! Seeing the motorcylist lying in the middle of the road, with the plastic parts from his bike all over the place. But after that, he's fine leh. Could still chat with his friends happily after they came down. -.-

I just wish everything could just stay this way. Lovelle, Mommy, Dear and those friends (you know who you are) by my side. That's all I need. I don't want any changes anymore...

2009-09-01T14:17:00.005+08:00

The thought of needing to save photos during my birthday from facebook and uploading it here makes me sooo lazy to update.

Lots of things happened recently, since it ended up this way, I don't see the need in blogging my birthday photos. I appreciated what he has done on that day, making everyone feel that I'm soooooo lucky. But to think back, if I didn't make that decision .. about 3 months back? I should be still staying home, with no celebrations, nothing. Let alone the bouquet of roses, the ice cream cake and the wallet.

So .. I'm not that lucky actually. Its just .. Hmm .. no words to explain.

Lovelle, Mommy needs you. I won't let you leave my side. No matter what, what ever it takes.

OKAY! What's worth for me to blog about for the past 2 weeks.. =X

22nd August 09

Thanks alot dear. Its not just this that you pasted on your car that I thank you for. Thanks for making me feel loved and letting me know that I deserve love even though I'm a mother already. Thanks for reminding me that even though I'm a mother, I can have dreams too. I can still walk in a huge ballroom in a beautiful wedding gown and say I do. Thanks for telling me your plans in life, including Love and me in it too. Thanks for making the effort to get what I want, for example, finding carrot cake for me at 4am in the morning. Thanks for being there for me when I broke down, needing someone so badly to console me, telling me what to do. Thanks for .. helping me without letting me knowing, & reading up baby/toddler books, teaching me how to handle Love.

Yes, I'll never know what kind of person you might be as the time goes by. Maybe you will start to throw your temper at me, maybe you will neglect me. Maybe we will quarrel over Love. But for now, I know you're treating me the best you could, and we'll go through this together, as long as we don't change drastically, we still show we love each other.
Every 29th August would be our day. (:

29th August 09

Tingg mommy's Xavier's 1year old celebration, at her place.

I was duper late because Love was sleeping, then I had to go and get a gift. Plus traffic jam and all. Really happy when I saw Lynn and Sandy, of course Amberlyn and Phoebe too. Hahahs. Beeeeennnnn soooooooo longggggggg!

This were Phoebe, Love and Amberlyn when they were a couple of months old.

And now. Love, Phoebe and Amberlyn.

Its been so long! Love didn't have the chance to meet up with them in the past. ): But not now anymore! So pleaseeeeeeeee. Ask me out! =D

Then home to put Love with Mommy. Went out to watch Final Destination4. Freaks me out. I really can't watch these images, so bloody. Kind of screamed during some scenes. =X

30th August 09
Paternal grandma's 81st birthday. All aunts and cousins made it. Gave grandma a surprise. She's really happy. (: Photos in facebook again. Zzzzz. Lazy!! But there are photos of Love and her. Great granny with great grand daughter. Didn't talk much to cousins though. Hmm..

Mommy brought Love to Yishun, maternal grandma's place. & I went prawning, for the first time. Pathetic 2 prawns. LOL. But as I said, its the bonding that matters. Everything went well for the first two hours, but not for the last. Stupid things cropped up, problems arised. But dear, thanks for being there with me. (:

As for yesterday, 31st August 09,
Cooked pasta together, hashbrowns and nuggets. Such a cosy feeling that I've always wanted to have. Then fried carrot cake in the early morning, at 4am. LOL.

2009-08-18T15:14:00.006+08:00

Those who asked to be linked or relinked, I've done so already! (:

Thanks to :
SANDY mama SHULING mama, CHUBBS, KRISSY mama, NV ER, CHULIEN, JOANNE for the birthday tags.
PEARL mama, DANIELLE, ARTHUR bro, JOYCELYN, JEHM, NV ER, YANTING mama, JOKER, JOSHUA, MICHELLE, DICKSON AND CINDY mama for the birthday smses.
YANTING mama, DYM mama and TINGTING for wishing me happy birthday via msn.
NV ER and CHUBBS for wishing me happy birthday by blogging.
L, XIAOHEI, TERRENCE, YVONNE and AHWEI for celebrating my birthday on the 5th.
CHUBBS, GIRLFRIEND, BOYFRIEND, YUTING, YUKI, REGINA and JASMINE for celebrating my birthday on the 6th.

Thanks for :
Bouquet of roses and heart shaped ice cream cake and wallet from K.
The supposed to be red packets from the ladies and birthday card from GIRLFRIEND.
Sony ericsson W995, bag, heels, slippers and clothes from WL.

My ladies say I'm the luckiest girl on earth on my birthday this year. Is it really so?

Stomach flu sucks to the max.
What have I been doing the last few days ..
Okay!
Met up with Yuki and Shaan on the 12th, Wednesday at Clementi Central. We had nothing to do but just walk around. Went Mc for fries. Took photos. Then home cos my cramps was acting up again. Booooo.
Went to Etrini's baby's full month celebration on Sunday, the 16th. Her girl is soooo adorable, didn't have the chance to carry her due to Love though. ): Had a fall down a few steps on the way there, ): cuts here and there. But luckily Love's alright, still can laugh at me. -.-!! Saw many mamas, initially I couldn't recognise some of them cos I've never met them before. Shuling recognised Love, with the amount of hair she had. LOL. I'm actually quite amazed by how baby boys really 'fight'. Hitting each other's heads, pulling hairs, taking each other's pacifiers. Love somehow was one of the victims too. =X
Left at about 6pm+. To AMK for dinner with my ladies, and then cabbed to Bishan for fish spa. Cos its dearest YUTING's birthday celebration! ^^ I was screaming. I didn't dare to look at how the fishes nibble on my feet. Lol. Love tried too. Then she quickly stood up from the water. A friend of theirs came with a cake. then home sweet home. (:

Photos up in the next post, maybe.

2009-08-09T13:57:00.002+08:00

Won't be blogging for these few days cos I'm having stomach flu. Went to NUH A&E last night, or rather this morning.. Waited for like.. 3hours in total. :( It hurts, alot. Didn't even have the mood to get out of bed to use the laptop. Luckily there's my new phone to use. ^^ I'll blog about my birthday celebration really soon and thank everyone of you who wished me happy birthday.

Tata!

2009-08-04T00:00:00.005+08:00

psb , don't wish to talk about it. (:
namee , nice chatting with you on msn! ^^
Huiping , yes, the feeling suck. but have no idea how to be a better mom to her either. X.X
i have a heart/shaan , whatever lah! lol. you got the photo already uh.
Penny , haven't got the chance to chat with you!! hahahs. soon soon k!
Angela , hahahs. I'll edit it in sooonnnn.
pearlYEO & toreishi , chubbs and bf, thanks! (: LOVES!
Elaine , my email, qiyin-@hotmail.com
priscilla , (: thanks! hahahs, when the time comes, you'll just push naturally. mother's instinct maybe. hahaha.
Pearl , ABSOLUTELY! she loves food that we eat, but not hers. -.-
yeye , seen it! took a photo from there too. =D

2nd August (Sunday)
Met up with Cindy mommytobe with her lil bro at ChoaChuKang station. Supposed to be 1.30pm but I was late and only reached at 1.45pm to 2? =X Sorry girl! Was thinking of taking a cab down to Stacey's. But there was such a long queue at the taxi stand that we changed plans and walked to the bus stop instead. This mama shocked me by carrying my whole pram and things down the stairs when I put Love at the bottom of the stairs. She carried Love, and I carried the pram up the bus, luckily the bus is those for handicapped, so I don't need to close the pram. ^^

There were LOADS of people when we reached. Lots of kids. Love had a great time. & thanks Cindy mama for taking care of my hyperactive girl, while I took care of Jayven. XD & I got to know one of Stacey's friends who happened to be my secondary school junior. AND OH! I saw her class photo and I kept complimenting on this girl, whom I think she's so darn chio! & they kept laughing at me. -.-
Wanted to head down to Admiralty to meet up with some other mommies to be but we got really tired and lazy and cancelled it in the end. Left there at about 6+pm? (:

I had a really great time, and I believe Love did so too. I'm also quite amazed by how us mommies can just click like that and talk as if we've really known each other for a long time! Like, its not pretenious, we say whatever we like and we kind of know that the other person wouldn't be offended kind of thing. Its nice meeting up with Cindy and Stacey for the very first time, and we'll meet up more often in the future k! (:

this is the one month old baby boy, Jayven! he's really adorable! with all his multi expressions which he learnt from his mom I think. haha! the mommies who were there that day. the mommies and Stacey's friends. Love and Velda(Stacey's niece) Stacey, me and Cindy. (:me and Stacey. me and Cindy, we were really bored since Love was taking her nap. lol.okay! this is Stacey's nephew, Zac. & he was playing with Love. I think! it started with Love standing there with her pacifier in her mouth, and Zac came over to kiss her pacifier, or is it just taking a close look? can't remember. Love still shared her smelly pillow with him. wanting him to smell it. -.-
Love got a boyfriend! HAHAHA.

2009-07-29T01:55:00.002+08:00

cakee , yes! when would we be meeting up again? for bibi and lovelle to play together? =D but you seem busy though. hahahs.
passerby , hmm, I prefer not to talk about it in my blog. & I'd prefer telling someone whom I know who he/she is. cos passerby could be anyone else and how would I know if .. ahh, yaa. you should know what I mean. you could add me in msn at qiyin-@hotmail.com though, if you're really interested in knowing. (:
Joycelyn , thank you! call me out soon k! stop sticking with gerald! my girl is far more cuter than him. =x haha!
Passerby , hey. checked the IPs and if I'm not wrong, you're someone I know? and if you're really someone I know, as in chatted before, could you add me in msn at qiyin-@hotmail.com? but if you're not that someone, then forget it, cos I'm not going to believe a single word you say. (:
yeye , I replied you in your tagboard. ^^
namee , yes I was from fmss. you know me? (:
Penny , I didn't apply any stretchmark cream because I don't have the money to at that time. =x I think its because when I was pregnant, my tummy's quite small, as what my relatives said, that's why I don't have any on my tummy. but there are a few on my thigh and lots on my butt, I think, I couldn't see it myself! LOL. hahahs, & thanks for thinking that I'm the best. HAHA.

Something happened(not to me) and it reminded me that I'm should be glad I have the support from family and relatives, so that I could bring Lovelle out into this world. I shouldn't be taking it for granted.
No matter how tough is the road going to be in the future,
Lovelle,
you have me and I have you in our lives.

Contradicting, I know, but sometimes I really ponder and wonder, do I have the means to be a mommy? Can I be a good mommy to Lovelle at such a young age? & really, sometimes I feel that I'm such a fuckedup mother and I'm actually not ready for it, even though almost 18months had past, and she's turning that old soon. What's the fucking problem with me? Is it just me, or some young mommies are experiencing it too? X.X

2009-07-27T01:18:00.006+08:00

Joanne, relinked!
daw , hahahs. & nope, I don't have bluetooth in my laptop. hope to get a new phone soon thoughhhhh. XD
AYWX , shuddup! LOL.
TingTing , (: thanks!
Vivian , haha, I think I remembered already. Yes! Nowadays all babies are sooooo clever!
wilson , hello, I don't know which wilson are you, but I think you're wilson tan eh? ^^
stacey, I'M COMINGGGGGGG!!! &&& relinked! (:
Elaine , (: linked!
wl , XD
missJAC , really want my life with her cheekyness. lol. if there's ever such a word. =x
jiahui , (: linked too!
Penny , hello, linked you up ! oh don't envy, photos are deceiving, and as you see, I didn't take photos at sentosa sitting down showing my tummy because its REAL fat with that 3 layers! hahaha! yeap, I don't have stretchmarks on my tummy though, a few on my thigh and I think alot on my butt? lol..

I just love replying so many tags! BUT, its accumulated within a week or so. -.- Make myself feel better only. HAHAHA.

Photos saved from Girlfriend's blog.
Metup on 22nd July (Wednesday)
Went to WestMall. Girlfriend helped to entertain her while I had my meal.
LOOK AT HER FACE! VERY CHEEKY EH!

My beloved Girlfriend, at Macdonalds. (:
At some playground nearby.
Mommy & Daughter
Jasmine, TracyBoyfriend & me on the top. Yuting, Love and WayneGirlfriend at the bottom.
Love's expression when Girlfriend asked her to smile. SO FAKE! It wasn't just this actually, I was beside her. But my expression's reallyyyy ugly so asked her to just crop Love out. ^^

Okay .. What else ..
Yes! I met up with Jasmine, aka JEHM and PearlMommy on 25th July (Saturday). Hahahs, because of being pregnant, there's a privilege of doing things slowly and meeting up at a later time. Haha! Met up at about 5.30pm at Takashimaya. Had KFC. Walked around and Mommy came down from work. Went to the new shopping mall(?) Ion, we didn't explore the whole place though. Cos its really crowded, a pram plus a 7months pregnant lady, better not take the risk. This was my first time meeting up with Pearl. & first time to have an arranged meetup with Jasmine! (:
I hope to meet up soon with you ladies again yeah!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& .......
I'm really glad that I'm of some help to StaceyMommy when she called me, just earlier.
Hey girl! If you ever have doubts to clear, just dial my number yeah! I'll be there! I know, its hard, but I believe, for your boy, you will get through all these cryings and enjoy how he grows up, step by step. (:

2009-07-22T10:42:00.002+08:00

I'm amazed by what new things Love learns everyday.
She learnt this a few months back but not consistent in doing it.

NOW.
She purposely drops something on the floor.
Did it to get our attention.
Then when I look at her.
She will orh hor!~ and uses her index finger, 'pointing' at me, as though its my fault when its clearly hers! ><
Faints!*

Love her cheeky face. Haha!

2009-07-18T22:06:00.004+08:00

missJAC , of course I miss you! meet up soon lehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
GINNIE , oh right. (:
yuki , heeeeee. thanks. missya too!
wenfang , thanks! (:
Daw , hmm, the mouth area that looks alike that's why. I don't know how to use bluetooth! =x laptop don't have or something, aiya I also don't know.
HUILING , thanks! (:
stacey , see you soon yaaaa!
AYWX , hahahs, cos she has the eyes of her dad.
joanne , yeah! sure! linked!
nicolle , but he's your child! she has no right to take control of your son. try your best yaaaa! (:
chubbs , XD
dym , hahaha. yeah, that's why I love it so much. ^^
toreishii , wayne , chubbs , BF, GF, CHUBBS, I MISS THE ALL OF YOUUUUU!

Joke of the day for my family.
Mommy was telling Love that the dustbin is very dirty, don't touch it.
15minutes later ...
I wanted to give her some water.
We couldn't find the bottle anywhere! Not in the room, not under the tables and sofa.
We asked Love where is it, and just goes like, hur? and lie down flat on the floor, trying to look for it too.
We searched high and low.
We gave up. Mommy went to throw some rubbish.
& she saw Love's water bottle in the bin!

-.-!!

Then there's this 'conversation'.
Mommy : you come you come! why you throw your water bottle into the bin!
Love : hur? o.O
Mommy puts it back into the bin.
Mommy : where's your water bottle?
Love : 'sounds like there', and points at the bin.
Mommy : why didn't you tell me just now when I asked you? now I found it already, then you point here.

HAHAHA!

2009-07-15T17:44:00.001+08:00

Is there an easier way to live my life?

2009-07-13T21:57:00.002+08:00

I don't have cable or whatsoever linked from my hp to laptop. So I could only send mms to my email once in a while. ):

When I asked her to say cheese, she says chee~ and her expression is like that!

2009-07-12T15:13:00.004+08:00

chubbs , haha! misses!
Angela , hello! linked!
Sandy , yes, its been a longgggg timeeeeee. so when are you going to meet me, you busy mother of two, of which the younger one I haven't even seen before yet. hahaha.
sicheng , hey! (:
meixing , yup. (: she don't have curls? you meant the blog main pic is it? that's because she just woke up, I think. hahaha. you don't come online often yeh?

Love just stood on the bed,
faced the toilet mirror,
waving to herself,
making funny faces to herself,
and
swaying side to side while listening to music.

-.-

2009-07-06T15:30:00.007+08:00

FAVED PIC OF THE DAY!! ^^
we just love kisses. don't we? ^^ make us feel loved.

She's my BOYFRIEND! I don't know why but I was putting on that pout expression whole night long that day! Act cute ma. =x

That's boyfriend.. and CHUBBS!

This is GIRLFRIEND!
&&&. this is sexy .. YUTING! Haven't got a name for us yet, YET.

The group photos.

& the photographer for the group photos!

Chubbs's ex classmate, SHAAN!

Not sure if you'll have a chance to see this, but nice meeting ya! (:

*I'M A MOTHER!* hahaha!

2009-07-06T14:33:00.002+08:00

toreishii , loves and misses!
pris , thomson medical centre. (:
wl , haha. I'm always online! its either our timing is really baddd. or I blocked and deleted you. or email's different already. add me again? qiyin-@hotmail.com (:
JEHM , not good shape! Its flabby everywhere! =x
wk , hello! hahaha.

Lovelle turned 17months old yesterday!
& she finally knew how to walk!
BUT! She's just lazy. -.-
I think she feels that she can get anywhere by crawling, and its faster, no risk of falling, so why not, or something.
One bad habit of hers. She stomps with one foot when she's angry, when we don't give her the things she want. & screams at the top of her voice.
In the past, it was the stoning baby out of the 3(amberlyn & phoebe), now people say, she's one guai lan baby. >.<

Received a missed call at 9am from Stacey mommytobe. Messaged her at 11am+, she called back, telling me she's in the observation ward in KKH! Hahahs. This was the first time I was talking to her on the phone and it had to be telling her not to worry and everything would be fine. I'm darn excited for her lah! Perhaps cos I used to give her advice in tags and stuff? Just pray that she would have a smoooooothhhh labour. Then she can be proud to say I'm a mother! Was thinking to visit her later or something. But not sure if she's giving birth today ornot. Hmm.. The news of her going to give birth just brightens up my day lah! I don't know why also.

(4thJuly - Sat) Met up with the ladies again, this time as usual, at Cineleisure. We were suppose to meet at 5.30pm. But the earliest was 6.30pm, latest 8.45pm. Ladies! Haha! Took tonnes of photos again. From LJS, to staircase in Cineleisure, to the toilet, to the smoking area. I'm beginning to enjoy taking photos already. Hahahs. I used to siam when they were taking photos. =x

Upload photos later perhaps. Gonna take a nap or something since Love's napping too. OHYA! Got somewhat addicted to this HongKong drama series.
巾幗梟雄
http://www.mysoju.com/rosy-business/
(:

2009-07-02T20:58:00.022+08:00

Photos from Sentosa Outing.
These are most of it.
*Some pics are taken candid. Please don't mind the fats. =x*
Captions will be filled in as and when I thought of it.

Pink bikini - ReginaLady
Blue top - TracyBoyfriend
Blue tankini - Yuki
Pink top - PearlChubbs
Black spag with long pants - WeiningGirlfriend
Tall guy - Benedict
The other guy - ZhiXiang
(:

Used to being a mom. Haha! I stopped the game halfway after seeing a daddy holding his daughter on the sand, enjoying the water.

2009-07-02T19:57:00.003+08:00

xiiaobaii , or rather, I left my link in your tagboard? haha!
Wayne , I'm not sure if she still remembers you ornot eh! she hasn't been hearing the ning ma for quite a long time already. haha. she knows how to walk already lah! but lazy laahhh.
missJAC , okay. after your trip from thailand I think.
yuki , cannot! I've only got one table! lol..
dym , yes! ouch for my lappy! since Love didn't get hit by it or whatsoever. haha!
passer , is it? haha. but I'm not rich.
jasmine , (: linked! thanks! you take good care of yourself and the lil' one in you ah!
chubbs , I enjoyed myself! hope you did toooo! loves!
tingg , haha. not free on sunday! other days leh? no lah! I was in the toilet! & excuseme! I not like you lor. play play play, maple maple maple. =x!

Right. Had a sentosa outing with my girlfriends(PearlChubbs, TracyBoyfriend, Weining Girlfriend, ReginaLady, Yuki), ZhiXiang and Benedict yesterday. It was awesome, I enjoyed myself, totally. TracyBoyfriend and Yuki brought their homemade sandwiches and cookies for a picnic. We played monkey in water, and stuff. Took loads of photos, but I'm really lazy to save every single one of the photos from FB and blogs. Shall see how again. Hahahs.

I really miss this kind of gatherings with the ladies. Such a pity Yuting couldn't come. But there are more chances coming along yeap! (: Its beennnn.. I don't know, 2years? That I couldn't bond with them like that. I'm never ever going to miss any of these again, unless of some really important reasons, like Love or something. I LOVE YOU LADIES!

2009-06-30T13:24:00.002+08:00

What The F.
Love pushed my laptop to the floor from the table.
Now the laptop has a hugeeee crack at the corner.
With a small part of it broken, on the table now. ):

But luckily Love isn't injured.
She's such a clever, yet mischievious babygirl. Zzz.

2009-06-29T19:07:00.002+08:00

OH YAH!
Love walked about 8-10 steps yesterday.
& she walked few steps more than that, perhaps about 15? today!
It so depends on her mood whether she wants it ornot.
and its so out of the blue!

I was really surprised and touched? I nearly cried.
I know, I know, too emotional.

2009-06-29T13:52:00.002+08:00

missJAC , lol. you got to call me up! (: hahahs, thanks. but! you stay bukit panjang eh! I got to walk to clementi station (really far), then train to jurongeast, gotta change train, to cck. then! lrt to panjang. LOL. okok, I'll sms you when I wanna go your house. hahahs.
dym , luckily love's not that sticky to the pool. haha.
michelleTan , I wonder, if its my error in phrasing, or you don't understand. lol! you think too much lah! stuffed herself into a bag. walao! -.-
daw , she enjoyed the pool. and now she doesn't want to get out of the toilet after bathing! -.- jialat sia!
passer , ave2. why?
passer , uh huh. why? you know him?
pris , hi. I can't really remember the exact costs but its about $2000+ to $3000. medisave+cash. includes baby's fees also. hope this helps. (:

I went to a friend's 18th birthday party a few days back. Call me a country bumpkin, but I've never been to a private party, as in they booked the whole place. So yeah, pool table, darts, buffet, huge screen for karaoke, 6 bottles of martell. Hmm .. Then I recalled my 18th birthday. Shakes head. I'd rather not think of it. Okay, one thing worth to remember about, is that pearlchubbs and her bf came over to my place as a surprise for me, with 2necklaces as present. I totally love her. Oh, and kfc delivery from him. That's it. Hmm.. What a nice 18th. So yeah, I was really envious of the birthday girl that night. & she's really beautiful. Took quite alot of photos, but I don't know the cam owners. Lol.. No idea how to get the photos from them either. -.-

& I think Love's sick. ): she's been sneezing this morning. But not sure whether is it flu or just a morning sneezing thing. Sigh.

ps. I want mommies outing!

2009-06-24T22:15:00.002+08:00

pb ; ann , (:
wl , I knew it! when you were asking me to guess, I was like, could it be weilong, but I didn't expect you to be reading my blog lah! hahahs.
Alex , talked to you about it on msn already.
chubbs , okay.. that is if you know where I stay. hahahs. yeah!
passer-by , hello. Clementi.
Krissy , is it?! so coincident? but her chinese name, as in the character is kind of screwed up lah. cos our chinese suck, we didn't ask those professional, so ya, kind of weird. =x

(This is so not my day!)
I didn't close the room door last night before sleeping. My bad. Love woke up in the middle of the night and crawled out. Mommy woke up, panicked when she didn't see her on the bed. Went to the toilet to see if she's inside, nope. Went out to the kitchen and the back toilet to see, nope. Went to the living room, found her stuff in the bag out on the floor. She turned and saw this frog/tortoise on the sofa, if you get what I meant of the position. & she was sleeping. -.-! Shakes head lor! Then it became the topic of the day within my family.

I didn't realise that she could reach my makeup bag which was on the table. I was in the toilet. Then I heard things dropped. Then, damnit. My compact foundation's gone. Into many many lil pieces. ):

(On a brigher side!)
I'm going to bring Love for a swim with my aunts and cousins at YCK tomorrow! ^^
Yishun for breakfast.
YCK for swim.
AMK for .. window shopping & food, food, AND more food.
I really want her to enjoy playing with water. Makes it easier for me to bathe her also. Since Daw says that swimming helps in making her enjoy bathing.. (:

Just when I start to think, what happened between us actually, everything became blurred.